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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23166880">Use Me.</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Park_Jisu_18/pseuds/Park_Jisu_18'>Park_Jisu_18</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Bottom Komaeda Nagito, Emotionally Fragile Komaeda Nagito, Falling In Love, Hinata Hajime &amp; Kamukura Izuru Are Merged, Hinata Hajime is Too Rough, Hinata Hajime/Komaeda Nagito-centric, Insecurity, Kinda, Komaeda Nagito Knows How to Sing, Loving Marriage, M/M, Marriage, Mpreg, Possessive Behavior, Possessive Sex, Rape/Non-con Elements, Rough Oral Sex, Rough Sex, Sad Komaedo Nagito, Slow Burn, Suffering Komaeda Nagito, Temporarily Unrequited Love, Top Hinata Hajime, Very Insecure Komaeda Nagito</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 01:42:03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>30,852</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23166880</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Park_Jisu_18/pseuds/Park_Jisu_18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>He knew.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hinata Hajime/Komaeda Nagito, Kamukura Izuru/Komaeda Nagito, Kuzuryu Fuyuhiko/Pekoyama Peko</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>153</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>672</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Toy...</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Hajime Hinata <em>knew</em>.</p><p>He knew.</p><p>He knew of the control he had over the silver-headed man and, sometimes on rare occasions, came to regret his rough treatment with him. But he made it impossibly too easily. With his frail body and submissive nature, Komaeda Nagito made it far too easily indeed.</p><p>He was delicate and easily manageable, depending on the situation if handled correctly, and Hinata knew that he had all of the playing cards within his hands. That he could easily get the boy to do anything or whatever he so pleased. So without any regard to the boy’s discomfort, he commanded him to strip. Watching as slim pale fingers work off the article of clothing. Nagito’s arms coming up to hug his figure after the last article of clothing fell to the floor as if shielding himself from his view. But it was all in vain honestly, since he’s seen and did what he wanted with the man’s body an alarming amount of times. His figure is pale and oddly delicate, like without his bulky clothes successfully hiding just how frail his body was beneath it. His robotic hand gleaned under the light, reminding them of the event that led to the hand accident.</p><p>“Hi-"</p><p>“Did I say you can speak?” Hinata interrupted, his voice cold and indifferent. His tone caused Komaeda to flinch as he shook his head. “Use your words, <em><span class="u">Komaeda</span></em>.”</p><p>“Of course not, sir,” Nagito answered. His eyes trained elsewhere but him, making him release an irritated ‘tch’ and frown. </p><p>“That’s not the correct way to refer to me. Say the <em><span class="u">proper title</span></em>, Komaeda.” A shudder ran through Nagito. He bit his lips before uttering the correct words to appease Hajime.</p><p>“Sorry, Master.” Smirking now, Hinata leaned back on the black leather chair he was sitting on.</p><p>“Get on your knees. You know what to do.” Briefly closing his eyes as if he was mentally preparing himself for what he’s about to do. Komaedo reopened his eyes and went closer to his master before gracefully dropping down to his knees. His hands were hesitantly reaching out to Hinata’s pants. </p><p><em> ‘I know I’m a toy...but I...I always wanted you to love me, Hinata, ever since the day I met you. Even if I’m useless. Even if the only thing I can do is please you. Just love me, please.’ </em> Nagito thought as he unbuckled Hinata’s belt. His pants were next, with slim fingers, he unbuttoned the button of the pants and unzipped his fly. Then he reached inside and felt the fabric of Hinata’s boxers and shifted the cloth of underwear to get to Hinata’s long and very thick cock out of its confines. </p><p>Holding the appendage within his grasp, Komaeda looked up and saw Hajime’s eyes already trained on him. ”Well, what are you waiting for, useless slut? Don't tell me you forgot how to do the only thing you're good for? If you need my guidance pay attention scum-”</p><p>Not allowing Hinata to finish his words, Nagito wrapped his mouth around Hinata's cock. Hajime’s words died instantly. He felt his cock become entrapped within the warm and velvety confines of Komaeda’s mouth. Gripping one of the arms of the chair, Hinata snarled. “You decided to be useful, finally. How great.”</p><p>Bopping his head a few times, Nagito choked as Hajime delivers a sharp thrust. Trying to pull away, he was quickly held in place by Hinata’s hand. Holding him in place with ease, given how strong Hinata is. Accepting his fate, Komaeda could do nothing as Hinata forced his head to move up and down his cock. Before long, he was pulled off with a loud pop and thrown on the ground, his breath erratic and body shaken. </p><p>His body was far too delicate to barely handle such roughness.</p><p>Komaeda could barely even hold his upper body up as he coughed out weakly. He knew that Hinata was only getting started and for once wished that Hinata would take it somewhat easy on him, but he knew deep down that would never happen. After all, he was weak, good for nothing, and with the only purpose was to serve as Hajime’s fucktoy.</p><p>His usefulness ended with his body. </p><p>Hajime Hinata didn’t need to be gentle. He didn't need to be careful either. </p><p>Because Nagito Komaeda was just a toy, after all.</p><p>But for all that he was, he couldn’t stop the words that he blurted out next. He knew it wouldn’t change anything instead of maybe even worsen the treatment, but he didn’t care. Nagito just wanted him to know. “I love you…”</p><p>It was silent, and Komaeda briefly wondered if the man left him to his own device but knew that wasn’t the case. And true to his intuition, he finally received his answer came. “I know.”</p><p>It was a shocking revelation. To know that Hinata knew all along, but somehow it also wasn’t. Hinata was smart. Dangerously smart and to know that he knew of his feelings while he played around with him made something within him break a bit. But it was expected. Komaeda wasn’t blinded to the fact that Hinata was an incredibly attractive individual with potential partners lined up for him. He was a thing to simply pass the time but somehow foolishly thought he could be more. </p><p>But the reality of his current situation snapped him out of his fantasy of being able to be with Hinata romantically. It just wasn’t meant for him. </p><p>It never was.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I'll be revising future chapters constantly. Second, I'm entirely new to the fandom so I hope I do these characters justice.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Can I Call Myself His Boyfriend?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>   Laying on his side naked in Hajime’s bed, Nagito slept soundly. Slightly shifted his body in his sleep, and he felt an immense amount of pain travel up and down his body. Shocking him awake. And as the seconds passed, he became slowly aware of his surroundings and predicament, aware of the dried cum all over his body, which made him more than just uncomfortable.</p><p>He knew he should get up to go clean himself up, but he knew that if he tried. He wouldn't get anywhere. From the amount of pain from simply shifting his body earlier and the way how he can barely move his body. He deduced that Hajime had not only bruised and wrecked his body to the point that merely moving an inch or even a centimeter of his body hurts. Hajime had gone all out.</p><p><em>'At this rate...I'll be fucked to death by him...’</em> The thought alone made him shudder in fear.</p><p>He wasn't in any condition to move his body and felt that he should be fortunate that this time he didn't feel as if Hinata tore him a bit down there. It wouldn’t be the first time since lately the other boy been getting rougher and rougher as the days wore on. </p><p>Nagito knew he could handle a tiny bit of pain, but that didn’t mean he wanted it. </p><p>He knew that people had the misconception in their head that he liked pain. Enjoy it even. Just because he openly welcomes it. But in truth, he only does it so nobody else will get hurt because of his luck cycle. But when it comes to himself, as a person, he truly hates pain. </p><p>He despises it.</p><p>But yet, he’s willing to put up with it for the sake of others and a certain man named Hajime Hinata. The very man he loves and cherishes with all of his heart. </p><p>The same man that has been abusing him for the past few weeks now.</p><p>Ever since they decided to live on the island officially, he and Hajime started their relationship. There were already signs of them having feelings for each other before the killing game even began, and all that took place after. It was only a matter of time before they got together. Their classmates already saw it coming from a mile away. Since they were more than just glaringly obvious about their feelings, well...he was more than just transparent about his feelings.</p><p>After everything that was said and done, they started to distance themselves from him because of his involvement with Junko. How he had helped in their brainwashing and ultimately led them to do unspeakable acts. Such as causing the death of thousands of people and the reckoning of mass destruction across the country.</p><p> He became isolated.</p><p>And he couldn’t blame them or find any fault in their place in blame. He honestly wasn’t surprised by their hatred filled stares or the glares he received whenever he was around. He was more than a hundred percent sure that it was because of Hinata's influence that he wasn't torn apart by them yet. After all, Hinata Hajime was the official but also the unofficial leader of their group. His words were law, and even Fuyuhiko respects his words and every action he makes. So if Hinata said for them to leave him alone, they’d immediately follow through without question and hesitation.</p><p>He often began wondering if Hajime ever felt vengeful towards him, too, and was waiting for the right opportunity to hurt him as well. It wouldn't entirely surprise him either if that was the case. </p><p>But now that thought seems plausible... seemingly possible because as of late Hajime was becoming so much rougher with him lately. Even violent at times. That it's a stark contrast to when they had first gotten together, the dual eyed man used to be so gentle with him that he often felt as if he didn't deserve his lover’s love and kindness. He was treated like he was breakable. </p><p>Like glass.</p><p>He knew that at this rate that they were going in, it would only get worse. Komaedo also knew that deep down somewhere that this is maybe what he deserved. To be hurt by the one person that could hurt him. </p><p>Feeling tears gather within his eyes, Nagito slowly closed his eyes and felt his tears fall despite his best attempt at holding them in. </p><p>He was tired.</p><p>His body and mind couldn’t take it anymore. The pain was too much. </p><p>Before he knew it, he slipped back into unconsciousness. </p><p>Awaiting the darkness and its promises of painless sleep.</p><p><br/>~Hours later.~</p><p><br/>And that’s how Hinata Hajime found him, asleep with dried tear tracks staining his beautiful face. With his face impassive, Hinata gracefully got on one knee in front of the bed to stare at Nagito’s face and softly signed. He knew he was in the wrong on so many levels and forced himself to take in the other appearance, with another long-suffering sigh.</p><p>Nagito was already a delicate and fragile person, but to see him now. He felt an ache in his heart as he stared at the bruises, hand marks and dried substance covering almost the entirety of Nagito’s body. His frail and bony wrists were decorated in bruises ranging from purple to blue and yellow and red from his unyielding grip. Pale, delicate skinny legs were marred as well along with his hips. He was more than sure that Komaeda would be in this state for the upcoming weeks and would possibly even feel it even when the bruises disappear. </p><p>And suddenly, Hajime felt incredibly guilty. </p><p>After all, he’s been releasing his frustration and anger on a boy that loves him and would not even think to fight him back. And also, if Komaedo did fight back, he didn’t stand a chance anyway. Hajime was stronger, faster, and more resilient than the other boy, especially with his superhuman strength. So either way, Komaedo Nagito wouldn’t even last a second, with that thought in mind. He felt something else.</p><p>Pain. </p><p>
  <em>‘What have I done…’</em>
</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Going to revise this. Every chapter will be revised more than once. So you'll always see something different.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Can It Be?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I have no idea where I’m going with this.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>  Carefully and very, very slowly, Hajime picked up Komaeda within his strong arms. He was hoping and praying that he was careful not to wake or hurt the other even further. But it was all for naught, as the slightest movement caused Nagito to whimper in pain. His brows furrowed together, and before Hinata knew it, he was met with the most beautiful pair of green-grey eyes that stared at him in fear. </p><p>Looking into the albino’s eyes, he saw it all. The pain, the fear, and the utter confusion were the first two emotions that stood out the most.</p><p>For the first time since he’s known the other. He’s openly showing true fear, and it wasn’t directed at someone else but him. </p><p>Him alone.</p><p>And it left him stooped. </p><p>“N-no...p-p-please...I can’t...t-take another round, …right now. C-can we do it later? I promise I'll be f-fine by then. S-so please give this useless body time to r-recover, Hinata-sama.”</p><p>Hearing Nagito’s pleas, Hajime felt his heart clench painfully and gently and as reassuring as he could. Told his lover that he wasn’t going to do anything. “I’m just going to wash you up. Please, I’m not going to touch you again. Trust me.”</p><p>Not knowing if what he was saying was true or not, Nagito bit his lip. “Y-you promise?”</p><p>Making Hinata’s eyes momentarily widen, not expecting such a response from Komaeda. He had underestimated the amount of trauma he put his lover through.<em> ‘Do I truly have that right to call him my lover? My boyfriend even? After all of this?’ </em></p><p>Feeling his eyes soften, Hajime softly utters. “I promise you. I won't hurt you anymore.” Deliberately being mindful of his grip, Hinata made his way to his bathroom, sat Nagito on the toilet seat's lid, and kept him upright with his left hand. Next, he turned on the water with his right and waited for the tub to fill up. “I’m going to have you soak for a few minutes, okay. Then we’ll switch to shower and then another bath for you to relax, okay truly.”</p><p>Nagito didn’t respond, his eyes were threatening to close again, and he struggled to stay awake. But to show that he heard. He softly whispered a small little sentence that made Hajime blood run cold even though he heard it plenty of times. Only this time, there was no life about the way he said it. It made him feel odd. “Yes, master.”</p><p><em> ‘Why does it bother me now? I’ve been making him call me after a week into our relationship.’ </em>  He thought to himself. <em>‘Wait, why did I make him start calling me that!?’ </em></p><p><em>'Is it because of the merge!?’ </em> Feeling an oncoming headache, Hajime groaned and took his hand away from Nagito’s slender shoulder. So he can begin to undress, stopping himself from thinking about the matter any further. </p><p>His state of nudity caused Komaeda to sit up straight and glance at him in unease and alertness. Seeing the look, he held up his hands and said. “It’s only so we can wash together. I promise. I meant what I said; I won’t do anything more.” Making the older of the two boys visibly relax.</p><p>
  <em> ‘Fuck.’ </em>
</p><p> </p><p>~After Washing Up.~</p><p> </p><p>Drying Komaeda and himself off, Hajime dressed the half-conscious boy in his sleepwear. And then dressed in his own sleepwear. With them both in their pajamas, he pulled the covers off their bed and carefully placed Komaeda's body on the bed and covered him.</p><p>After making sure that Nagito was settled, he went over to his side of the bed and got in. The only thing on his mind was his actions that lead to this. <em>'What’s wrong with me? Why have I been acting like this? Nagito...don't deserve this. Especially not from me...or anyone. Just what’s going on?’ </em></p><p>
  <em> ‘It can’t be because of the merging, can it?’ </em>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>No, seriously I have no idea.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Lullabies.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I hope everyone enjoys this chapter.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>~The Three Nights Later.~</p><p> </p><p>    Feeling as if he was suffocating from being stuck inside Hajime’s cabin for the past few days, Komaeda slowly got up. His body was still sore and aching all over since that ‘day,’ but it was a more bearable pain now.<em> ‘I should go for a walk. Being cooped up for the past few days isn’t exactly a good thing.'</em></p><p>So with that thought in mind, he officially his decision to go outside. </p><p>Knowing just how the weather got during the night, he decided on something light to wear. With his choice of outfit laid out on the bed, he slowly made his way to the bathroom and washed his hair, and took a forty-minute shower.</p><p>Once he was done, he quickly turned off the water and grabbed a towel. Drying off his body and he put on his clothes and quietly exited the cabin. Fully aware that his '<em>lover’  </em>was somewhere on the island with the rest of their classmates.</p><p>Listing all the possible options of where he could go at a time like this. He allowed his feet to take him wherever they may take him and decided not to think about the location. As he thought deeply about Hinata’s recent behavior lately.</p><p>With that, he began to walk heavily in thought. So in thought that he didn’t acknowledge his remaining classmates, though, he had a subconscious inkling of knowing that they were behind him as he saw them from the corner of his peripheral vision. He was unaware of the attention he gained from his classmates that were out in front of the hotel. He didn’t bother turning around since he knew his presence would only cause an unease. So he carefully pulled the gates open. They seemed to be openly out discussing something anyway in hushed whispers, it seems. It made it all the easier to pay them no mind. </p><p>Since he knew they didn’t like the fact that he was with them. However, despite their otherwise aloofness behavior to him, they have done nothing to him because of Hajime. And for that, he was grateful that his lover was the leader of such a group. Had it been anyone else.</p><p>Repressing that thought, he carried on. Completely and utterly unaware of the eyes that were trained on him.</p><p>Arriving at the beach, Komaeda stood at a small distance from the ocean. Staring at the gentle crash of waves. His green-grey eyes took in everything.</p><p>With how nice the weather was here. His unusual choice of clothes was exchanged for something different, this time, and he had on white billowy pants and a loose shirt white shirt to match that showed off his shoulders. While for footwear, he simply decided to go barefoot.</p><p>The clothes made him appear all the more fragile as it swallowed his body, and the wind tugged on the loose clothing. Showing the outline of his wiry frame. </p><p>Moving away from his spot, he spotted a nearby palm tree and went to it. To sit by its trunk and lean against it. </p><p>Finding himself comfortable he began to hum a soft tune to himself, Nagito began to sing. His voice airy and light. His knees were drawn up to his chest as he sat on the beach, enjoying the peaceful crash of waves. The sand was still surprisingly warm and comforting even though it was night time, as he wiggled his toes as he continued singing his song. Unaware of his growing audience, their time as the most dangerous humans coming to use. </p><p>Making them difficult to detect. There was no sound in the steps as they stepped closer and closer to hear the song. </p><p>~Oooo oooooooo oooo</p><p>Oooooo oooo oo</p><p>Aaaahh ahhh aahhhhooo</p><p>Let me sing a lullaby</p><p>As you close your eyes</p><p>And as you're drifting off to sleep</p><p>How I hope that the dreams that you find</p><p>Are bright</p><p>Love, can we meet again soon in the bluest of skies?</p><p>Where a tomorrow waits for you and I</p><p>So hold me tight one more time, but don't kiss me goodbye</p><p>Cause I know that I'll see you on the other side</p><p>I will think of our song when the nights are too long</p><p>I'll dream of you for that's where I belong</p><p>Love, can we meet again soon in the bluest of skies</p><p>Only, in my dreams, do we meet again.~</p><p>Stretching one arm out as if to touch the sky, Nagito tilted his head slightly back to look at the starry night and continued to hum. Bring his hand back down, and around his knees, he sighs tirelessly and brings his head down as well. His chin perched on his arms now. “To think... I still… remember this lullaby. It’s been years. It’s… nauseating.”</p><p>Closing his eyes, Nagito began to rack his head for another lullaby. “Just one more song, and then maybe I’ll head for the night. But should I really head in, though? It's such a beautiful night tonight.” Gazing at the glittering stars that he couldn’t before see, in the city due to all the street and traffic lights. It was breathtaking.</p><p>Simply breathtaking.</p><p>Huffing, he shook his head, and he reopened his eyes as another song came to mind. Smiling a soft and gentle smile to himself, he started again. This time even sweeter and softer, as if he was caressing a restless child and putting them to sleep. His words were drawn out and soothing to the ear, causing his secret audience to relax as they listened to the lyrics carefully. </p><p>~Make my wish come true</p><p>Let darkness fade to light </p><p>Show me there's still hope</p><p>Show me it's not over</p><p>Battles we can win</p><p>Our struggle lies within</p><p>Will we live to greet the dawn?</p><p>Love will not leave you</p><p>Hate will not heal you </p><p>Promise me one day that peace shall reign.~</p><p>Once the short song ended, Komaeda heard the sound of clapping from what seemed like a multitude of people causing him to jump—startled and confused. He swiftly turned around and saw his classmates and smiled hesitantly in surprise. “Well, isn't this a surprise…”</p><p>“It certainly is, Nagito,” Hajime said, his mismatched eyes gleaming. “Why didn't you tell us you can sing?”</p><p>Looking away from his <em>  ‘lover,’ </em> he released another sigh. “...Well, you never asked. So I never had to tell.”</p><p>“I see.” Turning to his companions, he motions for them to stay back as he made his way to the albino. Crouching down in front of him, Hajime stared into Nagito’s eyes. “Would you mind singing for us in the near future?”</p><p>Biting his bottom lip, Nagito thought over his response before just sighing softly. Something he found himself doing a lot lately. But he knew that even if he didn’t want too, who was he to deny an ultimate. Especially his lover, who was the Ultimate of all Ultimate. </p><p>“Of course, love.” He smiled weakly. His eyes dull and lack any emotions. Which didn’t go unnoticed by Hajime's sharp eyes. Who stared back at him in concern. Which would’ve warmed his heart earlier on in their relationship but now only caused him to worry. </p><p>Did he displease him? He certainly hoped not. He wouldn't be able to handle it. Knowing that maybe, just maybe his body and voice isn't possible enough now.</p><p>In his mind, the only reason why Hinata Hajime was with him was cause of his otherwise useless body. And now possibly his mediocre voice. Trying to appease him, Nagito forced out a more convincing response. “Just say whenever you want me to sing, and I will, my hope.”</p><p>The response caused Hinata’s frown to deepen, severely worrying Nagito now.</p><p><em> ‘Maybe, I should’ve kept my stupid mouth shut </em>.’</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Still, no clue where I'm going with this...</p><p>But on the flip side, these lyrics belong to Amalee a.k.a Leeandlie.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Insecurities Become Reality.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>   Standing up, Komaeda lightly patted at his clothes to get rid of the remaining sand sticking to his clothes, while Hajime stepped back to give him space. Making sure that he got most if not all sand off his clothes, Komaeda looked at Hinata and sighed. </p><p>He knew he wasn’t quite up for small-talk with his beloved, so he gave another polite but tired smile towards the other and moved to walk away. Only to feel a strong hand clasp upon his too thin and too frail wrist and tugged him back with complete ease. Forcing him to collide into Hajime’s hard body, making him wince due to the impact.</p><p>“What are you doing?” He gasped as he felt familiar arms wrap around his small delicate waist, successfully holding him in place. He then felt cool breath of air hit the back of his neck, knowing well enough that it was coming from Hinata’s mouth. </p><p>Causing a slightly visible shudder to run through his body. “We need to talk.”</p><p>“...What if I don’t want to talk?” Making the others who were still present tense or either gasp in complete shock. Usually, he was always eager to talk or get Hajime’s attention, but right now, after everything he’s been through with the other. He just wasn’t feeling up for it. It was taxing and a very, well stressful situation that didn’t need an audience if they were to <em>‘talk’  </em>things out.</p><p>Taking a threatening step forward, Fuyuhiko was held back by Peko, placing a firm and steady hand on his arm. “What the hell, you fucking bitch!? Who do you think you are to reject-”</p><p>“That’s enough, Fuyuhiko,” Hinata said, his eyes never leaving Nagito’s. </p><p>Unable to handle his stare, he shifted his eyes elsewhere to get away from the intense gaze. Nagito then decided just to lay his head on Hinata’s shoulder. “Leave us.”</p><p>They hesitated. It was clear with their actions that even after all this time, they still didn’t care or place any of their trust or faith in Nagito. But it didn’t take away from the fact that they cared for the wellbeing of their leader, Hajime Hinata. With great reluctance, they slowly left one by one. But before they can all leave. They each gave one last warning glare at the albino, making him shrink within himself. Which in itself was unusual action, making some pause in doubt and others shrugging their shoulders. Not particularly caring about the action as long as they got their point across.</p><p><em> ‘You would think...with me being physically weak and actively trying to change for the better. They wouldn’t see me as a threat now. Especially since I'm dating the strongest and smartest man on this island. It's not like I can do anything anyway. It’ll be suicidal to even try.’ </em> Nagito mused. Which was true; he wasn’t a threat to them. Especially given their time as the Ultimate Despairs. They were physically stronger than him, even Fuyuhiko and Hiyoko posed to be more of a threat than him. Compared to them, he indeed was delicate.</p><p>Besides, he didn't want to go against them or even cause trouble. After all, he was genuinely trying to change.</p><p>“Don’t pay Fuyuhiko any mind. He didn’t mean what he said.” Causing Komaeda to snort. Hinata paused to stare thoughtfully at him.</p><p>“You know and I both know that's not true. He meant it. Besides, I’m...used to it by now. I already know what the others think of me anyway. It’s not going to change anyway. Well, anytime soon. Honestly, I’m surprised they haven’t thrown it in my face that I’m nothing more than a psychotic psychopath that was finally tamed and made to be your bitch, right? It isn't completely far from the truth. Hell, it might as well be the truth with how they treat me and what I did. I’m useless to them. I know that already too.”</p><p>Noticing that Hajime hasn’t said or interrupted him during his rant, Nagito slowly lifted his head. With his attention now back on him, Hajime held him tighter and said. “While what you said may be true about what the others think about you. I don’t think any of that is true. Besides, the Komaeda Nagito that I know doesn’t care or give a crap what people think. Yeah, you can be a bit much, but you’re still human. You have feelings. Besides, you shouldn't dismiss yourself as useless when, in reality, it’s not true.”</p><p>“...You’re only saying that because you feel obligated as my boyfriend to say it, Hajime-sama.” Laying his head back on Hinata’s broad shoulder, Nagito sighed tiredly. “You can...you can be honest. It’s not like you’ll lose your toy.”</p><p>Suddenly he was ripped around from Hajime’s figure and held at arm's length. The grip on his arms was bruisingly tight, and he whimpered and felt the grip immediately ease up. Without realizing that he even closed his eyes, his eyes snapped open. Forcing him to be met with an intimidating glare from none other than Hajime’s heterochromia orbs. <strong>"W<em>hat. The. Hell. Did. You. Just. Say?! You aren’t just some toy for me!? </em></strong><strong><em>How can you even say that after all this time!?</em> "</strong></p><p>“...Look at how you’ve been treating me...recently.” Not being able to hold his stare any longer, he glanced down. “I expected that my relationship with you was too good to be true… and I was right. You were so... gentle to be at the beginning of it. Now you’re just...h-hurting me. I’m back to feeling insecure about myself and what I am to you.” Taking a deep shudder breath, Nagito continued. “Listen, I’m used to being disliked, ignored, ridiculed, used, or even tossed away. I was fine with that. But then, you came along and showed me that I deserved good things too. I...I...I just don’t know where I stand with you anymore. You say I’m not just some toy, but why do I feel exactly like one!? Do your <em><span class="u">friends </span></em>even know how you’ve been treating me?” </p><p>Tears threaten to spill from Nagito’s eyes. “I just have to know. Was I ever even your first choice? Or was Chiaki your first choice now that I think about it? Did you ever even love me?!” Nagito asked, his breathing becoming erratic. </p><p>“Answer me...please…” </p><p>“A-are you...are you with me because Chiaki isn’t alive?”</p><p>There was no answer.</p><p>But it was all the answer he needed.</p><p>And with that, Nagito tugged his body away from Hajime’s clutches and walked briskly away. Once he was inside their shared cabin, Nagito let it all out at once.</p><p>He was distraught.</p><p>He was upset...and hurt. </p><p>Upset and hurt that Hajime hadn’t given chase. </p><p>Upset and hurt that Hajime didn’t pull him back into his strong arms again.</p><p>Upset and hurt that he couldn’t and possibly never compete with the one and only Chiaki Nanami, an already deceased girl.</p><p>Upset and hurt that maybe after all this time, that people's words and actions were finally starting to get to him after years of purposely ignoring them.</p><p>Upset and hurt that Hajime, the only man he's<em> EVER</em> been in love with, didn't defend him against Fuyuhiko and allowed him to be called such a degrading name.</p><p>Upset and hurt that the same man he loved had let him go all too easily. Because if he were honest with himself, he knew that if Hajime wanted to. He could have easily held on without so much as breaking a sweat. </p><p>Meaning he had purposely let him go. And that was the final straw in breaking the dam.</p><p>But what he was the most upset and hurt about was the fact that he still loves him, and it was probably never a mutual feeling.</p><p>...Deep down, he always had the suspicion that maybe he was a replacement. But played it off and blamed on his insecurity. That perhaps it was all just in his head. But now that it’s been officially confirmed.</p><p>He felt...hollow.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I don’t like how this chapter turned out. So revising!!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Please Talk To Me.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>~The Very Next Day.~</p><p> </p><p>   Hajime never came back to the cabin. Was what Nagito realized as he awakened to the morning sunlight hitting his face as he rolled over in their shared bed. Sighing softly to himself, he stretched and yawned. His eyes drifted to Hajime’s spot and dampened, as tears threatened to come forth.<em> ‘When did I become so emotional?’ </em></p><p>Fighting back those tears, Nagito slowly pushed himself up and glanced around to confirm his suspicion.<em> ‘He never came home last night, huh? Not even to apologize or at least talk with me. Is he through with me?’ </em></p><p>Taking in a shaky breath, Nagito closed his eyes. The tears that he was fighting back managed to break through his squeezed tight lids and roll down his cheeks.<em> 'It figures, he’ll leave. I’m not special and was never enough.' </em>  Wiping away his tears, Komaeda opened his eyes, got up, and started taking out his clothes. Next, he went to the bathroom and did his morning routine and shower. Once he was done with his shower, he stepped out of the cubical and stared at the mirror. Staring back at him was his reflection. Hair pulled down by the water's weight and reached his shoulders with relative ease due to its length.<em> 'Maybe, it’s time for a change...I know one thing that has to happen, though. I have to leave his cabin and go back to my own. I can’t keep doing this. Being with him, even though I know I'm a lowly human who doesn't come close to the Ultimates, I still deserve not to be someone's second choice.' </em></p><p>With that in mind, he went back to the room and got dressed in simple black skinny jeans and a white t-shirt. Holding up his usual green coat, Nagito sighed and decided that maybe he should forgo the coat. What he’s about to do will be quite tedious and lead to sweating. So, to avoid that, he set the coat back down, went to the market, and returned with a travel bag. Managing to stuff some of his clothes into the luggage, he went to grab a few more items from the bathroom that was his but was stopped by the sound of the front door opening and Hajime’s voice a few seconds later. “What are you doing?”</p><p>“...Isn’t it obvious? I’m packing.” Nagito said quietly and continued to look for his bathroom essentials. </p><p>“I see that, but why?” Was Hajime’s next question. He didn’t move to stop him from packing, instead just observe and seek answers.</p><p>“That should also be obvious, Hajime-sama,” Komaedo answered as he grabbed his shampoo, conditioner, toothbrush, and skincare products that he happened to like. </p><p>“Maybe for you, but not for me. Why are you running away?” That stopped him in his tracks and made him turn around in disbelief and go over to his suitcase and dump his clothes in. With everything in the luggage, he faced his lover. Eyes wide in pure disbelief. </p><p>“You can’t be serious, right now? Running away...isn’t what I’m doing. I’m solving the issue at hand. You never even loved me. But I love you, and for me to still be here would only create more problems. As well as create an even more unhealthy coping mechanism. I refuse to create an even bigger problem and self obligation because of me. I-I want to break up, Hajime.” There it was said, and then there was complete silence for a while.</p><p>Before Hajime decided to speak up. “That’s..not going to happen.” Stunned at the quick rejection of splitting up, Nagito strumbled and sat on the bed and stared up at Hinata.</p><p>“W-why? Why can’t you at least let me leave this relationship with some of my dignity intact? It’s already bad enough that I-” Breaking down into tears, Komaeda brought his hand up to face, while his robotic one gripped the sheets.</p><p>Coming to where Komaeda was, Hinata kneeled in front of him and grabbed his hand. “Listen to me, please. You automatically assumed that I never loved you. I do, in fact, love yo-.” </p><p><strong> <em> Ack! </em> </strong> </p><p>With his real hand outstretched and aching with pain from slapping Hinata, Nagito could only stare at Hinata. Pain and grief swirling within his eyes. “Love me? Don’t say such a thing...You’re only saying that cause I called you out last night. You don’t love me. You love Chisaki Nanami. I was only her replacement. For you to just...I hate you!” Getting up to run away, Nagito was only able to take one step forward before quickly being thwarted and held down on the bed with Hajime on top of him.</p><p>“Just listen to me, dammit!”</p><p>“No, I won’t now just let me go!” Komaeda screamed back, his watering yet again as he struggled to escape only to gasp in pain as Hinata tightened his grip on his wrist and pushed his weight further down on him. </p><p>
  <em> 'H-he’s heavy...so heavy.’ </em>
</p><p>Keeping his grip strong and firm, Hajime peered down at Komaeda and said. “Then we can stay like this all night. I want you to hear me out, please!” Knowing that Hinata was, in fact, serious about his <em>‘threat,’</em> made Nagito sigh.</p><p>“Fine...we can...talk.”</p><p>
  <em> 'Finally…’ </em>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Komaedo Nagito.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>   Komaeda Nagito isn't a stranger to breakdowns and accepting people's accusations and hatred over his Luck Cycle, personality, character, and complex thought process. He spent his entire life doubting his existence and purpose and concluded that maybe his luck could be used for his advantage or other’s advantage. It's not like he had other things going for him or wished to live. </p><p>In fact, he knew that he could drop dead logically, and nobody would care or be physically, mentally, spiritually, or emotionally affected by his death. </p><p>Plus, if you consider that half of the things that happened in the killing game that he and his classmates had participated in wouldn't have happened if he wasn't alive or actively went out of his way to set off. But as the days wore on as he spent time with a particular guy from his class, something unexpected happened. </p><p>Something that he was unprepared for and didn't anticipate ever happening. Something unbelievable and incomprehensible that it took him quite a while to figure out honestly and when he was thought about it. It was a shocking revelation in itself.</p><p>He had fallen in love.</p><p>
  <em> Hard.  </em>
</p><p>And with the worst and best person possible, and that person was Hinata Hajime.</p><p>The very moment he realized what his feelings were. It became oh so clear but blurry. Why did someone like him fall in love? </p><p>But yet, how?</p><p>Because falling in love with Hinata Hajime is where everything ended, and everything began simultaneously. The deceitful lies, the act, and so much more. </p><p>And over time, as he grew to spend more and more time with his classmates. He became used to their wary stares and hateful accusations and backlash whenever he said anything. He had realized at some point too that it was because of him that they'd never truly become happy. With his existence, he was a reminder of what happened and what was lost. But he also realized by him dying; he'll lose out on something too. </p><p>And that something was Hinata Hajime, that name, that person. A person that he was/is in love with. It was vexing at first how he came to rely on the other so much. But in the end, he found out much later down the line that he genuinely didn't mind.</p><p>Because he loves him.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Delicate.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>   Finding himself back to where he was a few nights ago, Nagito found himself standing at the beach, enjoying the starry night sky and warm tropical breeze. </p><p>His gaze was empty and seemingly staring at something that only his eyes could see. Unaware of his growing audience yet again, as they shifted closer to him to see what he'll do or say. </p><p>Upon closer inspection, they saw that Nagito had changed up his outfit yet again. But what made them pause was the way his hair was style. It wasn't untamed and wavy like it usually was, it was neat, straight, and hung around his porcelain face. Framing his face in the best possible way, making them take in how fragile and doll-like he appears. His choice of outfit complimented his figure and fitted him quite right. It was weird seeing him out of his usual choice of outfit … It wasn't an unpleasant change.</p><p>It was nice.</p><p>Though the sweater Nagito had on complimented him nicely. Its color had them admitting that green, the exact same shade as his usual coat was truly his color. While his pants were washed out faded black jeans that clung to his legs in the most desirably. His feet were bare, but they took note of a pair of black shoes a couple of feet behind him with his socks inside so he can feel the sand between his toes. </p><p>His creamy shoulders are out on full display because of how the sweater fell off his shoulders due to it's cut, style, and size. They were able to see how truly skinny he was. It was something that they always kept in the back of their mind. But now, they were forced to see how truly fragile and breakable he was. He was practically a twig. They had always known that the other was delicate. It just never occurred to them just how delicate.</p><p>Class 77-B was stooped. </p><p>They watched as Nagito seemed to have snapped out of his thoughts and turned around and probably moved to grab his shoes and head back inside his cottage, only to stop once he caught sight of them. Taking in their casual stances, he gave them a hesitant smile. He saw that the rest of his classmates were present except for Hajime and the ultimate imposter. ”M-may I help you?”</p><p>It was silent for a moment before Fuyuhiko spoke up. “What’s going on between you and Hinata-san?”</p><p>Making Komaeda freeze, having seen the action Peko, Fuyuhiko, and Mahiru shared a look. But before Nagito could make up an excuse, Mahiru took over. “Hinata-kun seems a bit distant lately, and you’ve been completely isolating yourself too. We know that you avoid us for our sake, but it seems that you have become quite amended on not even showing yourself for even a second for us to know whether or not you’re even alive.”</p><p>“...”</p><p>“Listen, not all of us hate you. We’ve been thinking this over... For a while now and talking amongst ourselves and realized that you aren’t that bad of a person.” Mahiru continues. Her eyes determine, for what. He didn’t know, but it seemed that she wanted him to know that maybe he did slightly matter to them. </p><p>“... Are you saying this because of Hajime-sama?” He couldn’t help but ask. He was genuinely curious. Because no matter how many times he rationalizes it in his head. He always comes back to the fact that they have absolutely no reason to like him. The only conclusion he could come up with is mere tolerance because of their leader’s own slight ‘affection’ for him. “I’m not blind or stupid. I know that you guys are only tolerating me because of Hajime-sama. If it were up to you guys, I probably would’ve been dead or locked up a long time ago, and we wouldn't be even having this talk, to begin with. You don’t have to worry about Hinata-sama, he and I just got into a petty argument. He should be fine in a couple of days.” </p><p>Nagito realizes that he’s glossing over his abuse and the fight that he and Hajime had, but knew that if he was to reveal the truth. They wouldn’t believe him. Or wouldn’t want to consider that their perfect leader isn’t so perfect. </p><p>But as he said those words, he felt trapped under their intense stare and knew instantly that they didn’t believe a single word he said. Which was expected to say the least after everything they’ve been through. They got smarter, stronger, and more resilient. “Do you really expect us to believe that?” Hiyoko spoke up, her glare hard and face set in a rather serious expression. It was different from what he usually saw from her. Proving that not only had they grown, but also became more mature and mindful and tactical. </p><p>“Yes, do not forget. We know you and Hinata, what you guys are going through isn’t slight or little in the least. Not with how he’s been acting.” Sonia supplied, her eyes soft and tone patient. Besides, Mikan and Hiyoko, she was another one that definitely grew into an intelligent and mature young lady.</p><p>“So if it’s not much to ask, can you fill us in. We want to help.” Mahiru injected. Hands-on her hips, her candy red hair, which was now shoulder length shined brightly despite only the moonlight being the only source of light provided. It fitted her quite well. </p><p>Nagito opened his mouth and then closed it, and he closed his eyes for a few seconds to gather his thoughts before opening them. “...You...you guys won't believe me even if I told you. Besides, this is a matter between Hajime-sama and myself, so please understand me when I say that I can’t reveal that sensitive information.”</p><p>"Fine. It may be between just you and Hinata-san...But I can't help but wonder why you're calling Hinata-san, Hinata-sama.” Souda added. </p><p>It was then that they realized that Nagito hadn't once referred to Hajime as Hajime-kun or even just Hajime despite being his boyfriend. But instead, put a higher title on his name. Implying that they aren't even equal in their relationship at all. “...It doesn't matter.” He softly whispers. “Now, if you’ll excuse me. I’m feeling quite tired right now.”</p><p>Making his way to his shoes, he grabbed them and tried to bypass his classmates but was stopped by a firm hand latching onto his arm. “We aren’t done yet,” Fuyuhiko growled. His eyes narrowed dangerously. “At least tell us it isn’t as bad as we think it is.” </p><p>Desperately trying to tug his arm away from Fuyuhiko’s grip, Komaeda couldn’t break free. “Damn, you’re weak.” Making Komaeda glare at the short blond, and strengthen his resolve to get away from the hot-tempered blonde. Stepping on Fuyuhiko’s foot, he was rewarded with the ex-yakuza heir's tightening his grip, which resulted in him wincing in pain.<em> ‘That’s going to leave a bruise.’ </em></p><p>“Let go!” Nagito hissed. “You’re hurting me, damnit!”</p><p>“What’s going on?” Came Hajime’s voice and just like that, everyone stiffened and turned to face him. But despite everyone’s attention on him, he only had his attention on two individuals. </p><p>And those two individuals were Fuyuhiko Kuzuryuu and Komaeda Nagito. “Just what are you doing, Kuzuryuu-san?” Immediately the ex-yakuza allowed his hand to fall from Nagito’s bony and frail arm. Allowing Nagito to grab at his arm and hold it gingerly to his body. “I asked you a question, Kuzuryuu-San.”</p><p>“Was just asking him some questions. We were worried something had happened between you and him. Nothing more and nothing less, Hinata-san.” He replied back. His body rammed straight and imposing despite his height. Recently Kuzuryuu had a growth spurt but was still about two or three inches shorter than Nagito himself. He also started to fill out and was becoming more muscular. But still had nothing on Hajime or Nekomaru. </p><p>Nekomaru was still a broad, muscular, and tall individual. He towers over his classmates with ease. While Hajime had become more muscular and grown another two inches. His arms were no longer slender but muscled and hard, while his overall body became rock hard due to Nekomaru, Peko, and Akane’s workouts. Making Nagito miss the days where his boyfriend’s body wasn’t so hard and more on the comfortable squishy side.</p><p>But seeing how Kuzuryuu Fuyuhiko instantly straightened up his act around his lover, he was grateful that if there was anybody that the hot-headed gangster respected, it was his boyfriend. “Really? It doesn’t seem that way to me. Why were your hands on him?”</p><p>“...He was trying to run away.” That was the answer that the gangster gave and Komaeda couldn’t help the scoff he allowed to slip past his lips. Forcing everyone’s attention to him. Seeing that he had everyone’s attention, he smiled weakly. </p><p>“Please ignore me.”</p><p>“You were hurting him,” Hinata stated. It wasn’t a question but a fact. A fact that everyone knew and didn’t dare say otherwise. </p><p>“He was hurting himself.” Fuyuhiko counters stubbornly only to tense as his leader came towards him with precise and calculated steps. Standing in front of the other, Hajime stared at the anxious ex-Yakuza heir in silence. His stare was unnerving and voided of emotions.</p><p>And then, before anybody knew what was happening, he had Fuyuhiko up in the air, feet dangling as he held him by the front of his shirt with one hand. “I will only say this once and only once, so listen closely. I’ll advise you or better yet, any of you not to lie to me and never to put an ill intention hand on Nagito again. Do I make myself clear?.”</p><p>It was silent.</p><p>But slowly one by one, the class either nodded or voiced their agreement. “I’ve already made that grave mistake. I was abusive and inconsiderate. I refuse to sit idly by and allow anybody else to do their own damage. That’s a mistake I will never make or allow to ever happen again.” Stunning everyone by his confession, Nagito looked at him and slowly went up to him. His eyes were brimming with tears, and before he could say anything, he saw Komaeda’s hand fly up and allowed himself to get slapped. Knowing fully well, he could have dodged it with ease. But knew that deep down he deserved it.</p><p>Dropping Fuyuhiko, Hinata focused his attention on Nagito and saw him trembling. Whether it was from fear or genuine surprise from slapping him or anger because of what he said or maybe a combination of all three. He didn’t know but was most likely about to find out.</p><p>“H-How could you? How could you tell them!? I…I was never ready to tell them. That was our secret.” Komaeda utter, his expression full of pain and devastation. Not knowing what else to say, Hinata could only watch as Nagito turned away and ran far away.</p><p>Leaving him with the burning curious stares of his remaining classmates.</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Anyone got any ideas on where I should take this?</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. It's Over...</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I hope this chapter is up to everyone’s standards.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“What on earth did you mean when you said I made the same grave mistake too? Just what exactly did you do.” Surprisingly it had been Akane to ask, her eyes cold and hard. Her body was also tense and prepared to spring into action at a moment's notice if she didn’t so much like the response she'll receive. Because despite her initial dislike of the sliverette, she still was against domestic abuse. </p><p>In fact, all of them were, and as Hajime stared at them, his red eye glowed, and it wasn’t Hajime staring back at them but Kamukura Izuru now. “It’s just as Hajime said. We abused Nagito. Sexual that is. We didn’t rape him...but we did tend to get too rough and violent with him.”</p><p>“W-what?” Sonia gasped, her hands flying to her mouth in utter shock, while Gunham, who was next to her frowned deeply. His face set in disapproval. </p><p>“So you took advantage of his weak body. That’s despicable...even for mere humans like you.” Gunham stated. </p><p>Abandoning his principles, Nekomaru, along with Akane and Peko, attacked at once. Only to be halted by Fuyuhiko’s voice. “Don’t!”</p><p>Turning her furious gaze onto the ex-gangster, Akane hissed. “Why the fuck not baby gangster!? Did you not hear what he said?! Even though I don’t like the freak, he didn’t deserve that! Nobody does!”</p><p>Sighing, Kuzuryuu stuffed his hands into his pants pockets. His single eye staring hard at the three skilled fighters before him. “I know what he said, Owari-san. But by us resorting to violence, it’ll make us just as bad as he is. Plus, he seems like he’s already in his own personal version of hell right now. Look at him. Nagito’s pain and fear of him is his punishment. He has to work twice no actually thrice as hard to make it up to him and abbreviate that fear. With him knowing that the fear and pain that resides within Komaeda-san because of him, it will tear and eat him up alive. That's his punishment.” Kuzuryuu said, his words cutting through the growing tension, and making them realize that everything he said was very much real. </p><p>The look on Hajime’s face said and proved it all, even if it was Izuru that took over. He seemed a bit troubled, unsure, and slightly uneasy. It's the closest they have come ever to display such emotion.</p><p>It's as Fuyuhiko said, Hajime and Izuru didn't like their current situation. With their mind made up, they left but not before sparing their leader angry and disappointed glares.</p><p>Knowing that he should get going, Hajime went back to his dorm but before he could get inside. He caught sight of Komaeda standing outside his cabin, and his face pinched in uncertainty. With his real hand-drawn up to his chest. “I-is there a possibility that he’s inside? I did take a walk. So maybe he’s already inside.” Just as Komaeda talked himself into knocking on his door, his legs gave out on him and he went down with a little gasp. Only to be caught by Hinata and lifting him into a bridal style position. “H-Hajime-sama! How long were you standing there behind me.”</p><p>Instead of answering, Hinata walked to Nagito’s cabin. Once they were in front, Nagito took out his scanner card, and the door popped out. Allowing them inside the cottage. With them inside, Hajime carefully sat Nagito onto his bed and kneeled before him on one knee and gently felt and massaged his legs. While still keeping a careful eye on the Komaeda and his reactions. “Shall I go and get Mikan, and second, have you experienced this before? You... didn't necessarily seem surprised, you didn't even freak out when fall.”</p><p>Looking away from Hajime’s administration. Nagito sighed and answered. “...It has happened before. My body is...getting weaker as the days wear on. Mikan could probably help, but I don’t know what she’ll be able to do. I'm technically living on borrow time. The only reason why I'm still alive now is because of my luck. I was supposed to die years ago.”</p><p>Taking his words into consideration, Hajime stood up. “I’ll be right back with Mikan, with our combined ability and knowledge. We should be able to do something for you.” He turned to walk away but was stopped by a frail hand on his arm, stopping him.</p><p>Looking back, he saw Komaeda, his eyes already on him and shaken, but he seemed quite determined to say something, so Hinata gave him all the time he needed to speak. And once it seemed like he was ready to talk. ”Thank you...Hajime-sa-”</p><p>”Drop the sama and just call me by my first name, Nagito.” Hajime said, his eyes flicking with some unknown emotion that Nagito couldn’t quite pin. </p><p>“...” </p><p>“One day.” Making Nagito’s head snap up. The confusion was evident in his eyes. ”I’ll be able to make you not look at me in fear and doubt. I'm going to do whatever I can to make it up.”</p><p>“Y-you don’t have t-” Cutting Komaedo off, Hinata shook his head, and kneeled back down on one knee, and took Nagito’s hands.</p><p>“You say that, but that’s not true. I have too. I don’t know what came over me, but that’s not an excuse. You’re one of the few good things in my life, and I repay you by what? Hurting you. It’s unacceptable. I will do everything in my power to make it up to you. If you want to dump me, dump me. If you want to scream at me, scream at me. But don’t think you deserve any of this. Because you didn’t.” Kissing his hands, Hinata brought them to his forehead and said. “I want to regain your trust, and I would do whatever it takes to get it back. Even if it means separating from yo-”</p><p>Placing a slim and finger against Hajime’s lips. Komaeda stared into Hinata’s eyes, his lips parted slightly, drawing Hinata's eyes to Nagito’s lips. ”Eyes up here, Hajime-sama.”</p><p>Careful grabbing the wrist of the other, Hinata said softly. His voice barely above a whisper. "Please... just call Hajime. You don't have to call me that anymore, Nagito.”</p><p>”I know...it's just habits die hard. But you're right. I'm so used to forgiving you and being so submissive that I just took anything you would do to me.” Which was the truth, Hajime only never realized until now just how much Nagito allowed him and others get away with. He had been tied up, starved, punched, and so much more but took it all. He was knocked out of his musing when Nagito said his next words. “We should break up...” </p><p>It was with those words that things slowed down and came to a stop. The world became mute and dull without any color. If Hajime could be honest, he had been expecting them to break up. But what he hadn’t been expecting was for those words to make his heart feel as if someone ripped it out and stepped on it before setting it on fire. </p><p>He felt numb but knew that the pain he felt was nothing compared to what Nagito felt. It was nowhere on the same level or capacity of pain that his lover- ex-lover had gone through when dealing with him. <br/>He deserved this pain and felt foolish for even thinking of complaining about the pain he felt blooming in his chest when Nagito felt emotionally, physically, and mentally pained from his actions. He was a horrible person. </p><p>A horrible lover.</p><p>And an even horrible friend.</p><p>Suddenly he felt a delicate hand palm his cheek softly and stared into Komaeda’s grey-green eyes. “Don’t be sad, Hajime-sama...maybe, this breakup will be temporary… Just promise me. Promise me that you’ll take care of yourself. Even though it’s ridiculous of me to assume that my lack of presence would have a huge impact on you. I want you to still be-” Cutting him off, Hajime kissed Nagito one last time and rested his forehead against the other. </p><p>“Of course, you mean everything to me. I shouldn’t even be sad. I’m the one that suggested it. I’m the one that hurt you. Yet, here you are confronting me. I’m failing you now.” Hajime said, he felt tears making their way up. He tried desperately to draw them back in but couldn’t as a few broke through, and he moved his body to wrap his arms around Nagito’s petite waist. His face buried into Nagito’s stomach as sobs wracked through his body once he had successfully covered his face. Petting his thin and delicate finger through Hajime’s hair gently, Komaeda allowed his tears to come forth as he whispered soft words of comfort, and each word making Hinata cry harder. </p><p>Because it was official, they were truly over, and no amount of softly spoken words could alleviate that pain in both of their chest. <br/>With one wondering when did he go down the path of immorality.</p><p>And another questioning if he had this right to feel relieved but slightly saddened at the loss of a lover.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thank you for giving me your ideas and feedback everyone!!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Tsumiki Mikan.</h2></a>
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    <p>   After what felt like hours, Hajime finally pulled away from Nagito’s body and took a second to compose himself. Once he was confident that he wouldn’t have another breakdown, he offered the other a smile. “I’m gonna go and get Mikan so that she can help you, okay?”</p><p>Nodding his head, showing that he understood and appreciated his ex’s gesture. Nagito smiled as well and then allowed a tired yawn to pass through his lips. Raising a hand to his mouth, to cover his yawn, Komaeda blinked tiredly. “Okay...you do that, Hajime-sam-”</p><p>He stopped as he saw the glare directed at him and instantly knew what he did to warrant that intense and disapproving glare. Causing him to laugh nervously. “Sorry...Hajime-kun.”</p><p>Sighing, Hinata knew it was the closest he’ll get the other to say his name without that outrageous title. So he nodded his head in approval and said he’ll be back soon and left. Sticking true to his word, he was back in less than ten minutes with Mikan trailing behind him.</p><p>It only took a mere second for Mikan to take one glance at Nagito for her to start fretting over him. As calmly as she can, she had asked for Hinata to get Nekomaru as she examined the boy’s body and indirectly dismissed him. Her sharp eyes scanning over bruises and deep crescent-shaped marks that were unmistakenly done by fingernails that littered his legs and hips. Mikan, having been informed along with everyone else, knew what she was stepping into and turned to glance at the spot where Hajime was once standing. She was snapped out of her trance as Nagito said something to her. “...I know what he did was wrong, but please don’t shun him, Mikan. He...he’s going to need his friends to help guide him.”</p><p>Nagito can proudly say that over the amount of time everyone spent together, Mikan's confidence had improved significantly. And it showed as she raised an eyebrow and frowned at him. The Mikan prior to this would’ve stuttered and apologized over a multitude of times. This would’ve annoyed everyone near to hear it, but now, she was more stern, confident, and self-assured of herself. </p><p>She even clapped back at Hiyoko whenever the smaller girl thought she would stand and take it as she used too. It made Saionji grow to respect her immensely and, as a result, lessen and lighten the malice behind her insults.</p><p>Even Nagito felt oddly proud of her, like a parent that had witnessed their child’s success and was no longer needed for they had a grasp of their life now. Everyone had made improvements, even him. However, he was still as self-deprecating as ever. He rarely went on a hope monologue now. There was also the occasional struggle to put himself in a positive light every now and again, but he gradually got there. It was a slow process but still progress nonetheless. Which the others couldn't be more grateful for. Despite their initial dislike of him, they still wanted to see another human perspire. “I don’t understand you...if he had done any more damage to your body. You wouldn’t be alive right now.”</p><p>“So being tucked to death is possible. Interesting…” Komaeda commented, making Mikan frown.</p><p>“As you eloquently put it. Yes, that’s possible, and you would have died.” The ultimate nurse said, her eyes zeroed in on the bruises on Nagito’s inner thighs. “I don’t know why you don’t want me to ignore him, but I’ll try my best.”</p><p>“He...he’s been acting strange lately. He wasn’t aware of his wrongdoings for a while now. It’s strange.” Nagito replied. His eyes were staring off into space in wonder, thinking deeply about the strange situation that revolved around his ex-lover.<em>‘Could the merging have caused this? What if...instead of just merging or sharing a body. There’s a chance that a whole new persona is in there somewhere. It’s just a guess...I still can’t rule that option out, or maybe Izuru's more dominant personality is overshadowing Hajime’s and making him act that way without realizing, after all, he never did get the help he needed when merged. Dealing with another entity residing within his body can’t be easy.’</em> Before he could dive any deeper into his thoughts, he was quickly brought back to earth by Nekomaru's loud entry. “Nidai Nekomaru is here to help!”</p><p>Quietly walking behind the brute, Hinata shook his head and stayed a few distances away from them. Knowing that his presence wasn’t needed or wanted but still wanting to make sure that things were okay before he headed back to his cottage. He knew the only reason why Mikan even asked for Nekomaru was to help carry Nagito to the hospital. That way, he doesn’t have to do it. He knew that she knew what he had done and was more than just disappointed with him. He received her silent message loud and clear.</p><p><em> ‘It’s not just Nagito; I have to make it up too. It’s everyone. What kind of leader am I if I’m abusive towards my own partner.’ Hajime thought as he walked into his cottage</em>. Changing out of his clothes and taking a quick shower. He threw on some shorts, flopped back onto his bed, sighed to himself, and threw his arms over his face. Blocking the moonlight that streamed through the blinds that were fully closed. <em>‘I gotta be better.’ </em></p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Peko Pekoyama, Kuzuryuu Fuyuhiko, & Nevermind Sonia.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>  It wasn't entirely unexpected when Peko, Sonia, and Fuyuhiko decided to visit the Ultimate Lucky student in the hospital. He was struggling to stay awake as his body was pumped full of pain killers and medicine. He felt weak but was still surprisingly coherent enough to hold a decent conversation with the trio. </p><p>He had simply laid there in the hospital bed, listening and offering a few words with the three. He could only wish that he didn’t know what brought on their sudden concern for him, but he knew. </p><p>That the <em>ONLY </em> reason why they were even showing the slightest remote of care and remorse for a nuisance like him was because of the situation. The fact that it also involved their leader and no matter how much they didn't like him. They still wouldn’t wish what happened to him to happen to anybody, even to him. While he appreciated their gesture, he found himself wondering about Hajime. </p><p>“Stop thinking about that bastard.” Kuzuryuu's gruff voice snapped him out of his musing. Instantly shattering his trail of thoughts. Jumping a bit at the unexpectedness of it, he turned to the ex-yakuza. Innocent eyes were blown wide and startled, like a deer in headlights. </p><p>Rubbing the back of his neck, Fuyuhiko sighed. Pekoyama, having an idea of what was going through her young master's head spoke up, easily voicing his thoughts into words for him. “What he's trying to say is that by clouding your thoughts with only Hinata-san, you won’t focus on your recovery. So please don’t worry about him.”</p><p>Nodding her head in agreement, Sonia hesitantly reached out her hand and grabbed Nagito’s own bony and frail one. “You need not worry. Hinata will not come near unless you allow it. We want you to recover fully.”</p><p>Staring at Sonia, Komaeda glanced down at their linked hands and allowed a soft smile to grace his lips. “Hopefully...I can make a steady recovery.” He said, “But I want to tell you guys something. So please be open-minded about it. After I tell you guys about it, can you do me a favor and tell the others? Well, besides Mikan, since I already told her.”</p><p>“We will gladly listen to your request,” Sonia said. Her eyes determined, while Fuyuhiko huffed and turned his head away. His cheeks flush deeply, while Peko gave him a soft smile and nodded for Komaeda to speak.</p><p>Swallowing, Nagito looked up at them and held Peko’s and Sonia’s gaze, while knowing that even though Kuzuryuu wasn’t looking directly at him, he was obviously listening. “Don’t abandon Hajime-kun, please. He’s gon-“</p><p>“Why the hell not shouldn't I abandon that fucki-” Fuyuhiko started but was instantly cut off.</p><p>“Because I’m just as guilty as him in this,” Komaeda said softly. His eyes held sorrow, but deep down, he truly felt as if he was speaking the truth.</p><p>“Listen, I don’t understand how you are just as guilty as him? When he literally almost fucked you to death!?” Fuyuhiko countered. His eyes narrowed, and fists clenched tightly. </p><p>“Yes, please explain, Komaeda-san.” Sonia pleaded. Confusion and slight uncertainty of the direction this conversation was going in.</p><p>Biting his lip, Nagito looked at Peko and saw that she, too, was confused. Leading Komaeda to sigh and offer a broken and sad smile. “I gave my consent to engage in intimacy with him. When he started to get rough with me, I should have spoken up. Said something, anything really. But I didn’t. I allowed him to do as he pleased with my body. I suppose I’m partially to blame for this mess as wel-”</p><p>“Shut the fuck up!” The ex-gangster growled, his face darkened, and created a rather scary look that made Nagito freeze within seconds as Fuyuhiko directed his attention onto him.</p><p>Instantly reminding him that these people that he was with were dangerous. His classmates, who were fearsome and robust individuals, had once doomed the entire world into an apocalyptic state. While in contrast, he was merely captured and forced to become a slave/servant. </p><p>He wasn't like them</p><p>He was nowhere near their level of strength, not before or even after their Ultimate Despair induced state. His body has always been far too frail and weak to compare. So to be reminded of that so suddenly of who exactly he was with left him shaken. “But did you consent to almost being put on the brink of death!? Did you consent to be bodily harm!? Better yet, did you fucking consent to becoming his fuck toy?! If you didn’t shut the fuck up!!”</p><p>It was silent after Fuyuhiko’s rant, taking a shuddering breath Nagito steeled himself to look at the ex-gangster. “...I...I may not have consented to any of that, but I still love him. I don’t want him to be alone. Especially not now. He’s going to need you guys. I...I think he didn’t even know what he was doing. It was like he wasn't even Hajime or Izuru...it was like he was someone else entirely…”</p><p>Allowing that to sink in, everyone's eyes widen and judging by the look on their faces. Nagito knew that maybe that theory wasn’t just a pure guess but might be…</p><p>A plausible possible reality.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Just like every other chapter, this one will be revised too.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Monster.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>   Having left along with Pekoyama, Fuyuhiko made his way over to Hajime’s cottage. His strides full of purpose and eyes narrowed into dangerous silts. He was more than just disappointed with his leader; he was furious but knew that reacting violently wouldn't get him or anyone for that matter anywhere. If he was going to approach the problem at hand, he needed to stay calm and rational and not let emotions cloud his judgment. Despite wanting to explode and unleash hell upon his superior.</p><p>He had to think rationally, but no matter how much he tried. He just couldn’t get Komaeda’s broken smile and body out of his fucking head. He may not have cared that much about the fucker like Sonia and Mikan did. But he still saw him as a part of their group. He was still ultimately their responsibility. Because whether Fuyuhiko liked it or not, he knew that people saw him as the unofficial second in command in their group. While Hajime was automatically supposed to bring no harm to Komaeda because of his status to the fucker.</p><p>After all, Komaeda had placed his trust in Hinata. It was painstakingly obvious how much the bastard trusted Hinata. With his body, heart, and soul. So he was ultimately the last person they expected to hurt Nagito like that.</p><p>It went without a word that Komaeda Nagito was unmistakably the weakest, most delicate, and most fragile member of their group, so the others had reluctantly kept an eye out for him. Komaeda was the lover, well ex-lover of their leader, his one and only heart, so it was natural for them to look out for him. So they automatically felt as if they had to protect him. Even Hiyoko and Akane went out of their way sometimes to help him when they knew that he needed it the most. It was just how they were with him; they didn’t necessarily like Nagito but would protect or help him in a heartbeat if he needed it. But now he had to wonder about Mahiru’s words from earlier about how not all of them hated the Ultimate Lucky Student. Not all of them thought he was a bad person that he was alright. Just alright, but it was better than being outright hated. </p><p>So Fuyuhiko had begun to wonder, would the hope fanatic believe the photographer. Since it wasn't as if she was lying, on the contrary belief, she was telling the truth. Sonia cared.</p><p>Mahiru cared.</p><p>Mikan cared. </p><p>Peko cared. </p><p>The Ultimate Imposter cared. </p><p>Even Akane, who would always threaten to hit the fucker cared. But he sure as hell didn't care...well maybe a little bit but that didn't change the fact that the bastard was still annoying on most days.</p><p>Even still, he needed to talk to Hajime, even if he really just wanted to avoid the man in question until his rage subsided but knew it would take weeks, maybe even months for it to happen and he wasn't even the victim. Just thinking about what happened to Komaeda caused his hands to tighten. Peko having to have picked up on the tension and the slightest hint of change within Fuyuhiko, squeezed his shoulder. ”Please, go in this with a clear head. If you lose yourself in your rage. You'll do something that you'll come to regret. So please be mindful of what you're stepping into.” </p><p>Nodding his head in order to show her that heard her and that he would try to consider her words. He took in a deep breath, in and out repeatedly to calm himself down, and before they knew it, they were at Hinata’s cottage. Looking at each other, they silently held a conversation between themselves. And when it seemed that they reached an understanding, Peko rang the bell to Hinata’s cottage and patiently waited.</p><p> </p><p>~An Hour Earlier.~</p><p> </p><p>He tried to think. He desperately tried to think back to exactly where this entire situation became fucked. He thought and thought, and suddenly, he had it.</p><p>Hinata was able to pinpoint when everything began to fall apart successfully, and he only had himself to blame as he recalled the exact moment. That led up to this.</p><p>“Are you okay, love?” He remembers Nagito asking that night when he strolled inside their cottage. Fingers were already working on loosening the slick black tie around his neck, while Nagito had come up to him and gently helped remove his suit jacket. </p><p>“Despite being on ‘good’ behavior, it seems that their trust. Well, particularly, Togami’s trust in us is still up for discussion. It’s like every time we take three steps forward. He takes us two steps back.” He had snarled. He was tired and very much in a foul mood, and Nagito had obviously begun to worry. So worried that he had led Hinata to their bed and climbed in behind him so that he could begin rubbing his shoulders. His slim and delicate fingers worked marvelously on his stiff and wounded tight shoulder blades. He had remembered thinking about Togami’s clear disrespect and disregard for his classmates and had instantly pulled away from Komaeda touch only to pull him into his lap.</p><p>“Hajime?” Nagito had been confused and tried to angle his body properly but was quickly pulled up along with Hajime as he stood up and unceremoniously dropped onto the bed with Hajime quickly hovering over his body and stripping him off his pants. “H-Hajime slow down. Don’t you think y-your moving too fast?” </p><p>“Not fast enough.” He recalled saying and just like that. Komaeda’s pants were down, and he was already reaching over to get the lube in the bedside table. Coating his hand, he had circled Nagito’s hole and pushed in without warning. Making Nagito jolt in pain. </p><p>“H-h-hajime...p-please slowdown. W-While I’m ready to serve you, however, and whenever you want, just slow down. Pleas-ngh!” Not being able to finish his words, Komaeda cried out. </p><p>“All this unnecessary talking, and for what?” Adding an extra finger in and began scissoring Nagito’s hole for a few seconds and was quick to remove his fingers. With his fingers removed, he grabbed the bottle of lube again and put a considerable amount of lube in his hand and lathered his cock. </p><p>Position himself in between Komaeda’s legs.</p><p>“Wait! I’m still not ready, Hajime.” Komaeda said, and thinking back to that moment, he knew. He crossed a line that shouldn't have been crossed. </p><p>He had deliberately ignored the fear and nervousness that coated within his partner’s voice and had instead pinned down Nagito’s hands and said.</p><p>“What? I thought you meant to serve Ultimates? Well, your ultimate boyfriend needs a stress reliever.” And then he suddenly without warning, had brutally and ruthlessly plunged himself into Nagito’s warmth.</p><p>“Aaaaahhhhh! Ngh!” Once his screaming was done, Hinata began to move in and out in, his pace rough and painfully brutal on the older boy’s body. </p><p>Eyes wide with tears, Komaeda breathed heavily and allowed each pain-filled gasp or moan to leave his mouth as Hinata was relentlessly thrusting into him. His body was jolting each and every time behind the pure unadulterated power. “N-not...so..r-r-rough…nnngghhhh!” He had heard the weak plea of his lover and still continued on. He had been so stressed and overcome with anger over the situation. That he lost it and that the only thing that was on his mind was his lover’s body and feeling some type of relief. The power, the pleasure, and the bliss that he felt had completely taken him over and left him as a sorry excuse of a man. </p><p>His thrusts had only increased and, again, pulled a scream from Nagito’s lips. Only this time, it was a silent scream. </p><p>Before he knew it, he was pulling out of an unconscious Nagito and was huffing as he stood over the bed. Eyes blank and unfeeling.</p><p>Blinking Hajime snapped back into reality. His memories were playing over and over again in a constant repeat of the encounter and various others that followed similarly. He felt the overwhelming urge to throw up and permanently erase his memories all together once he started thinking back and was flooded with every cruel thing he had done in his relationship with Nagito.</p><p>The one person that was supposed to matter above everyone else. He felt sick.</p><p>
  <em> ’I've...turned into a monster.’ </em>
</p><p>
  <strong> <em> <span class="u"> Ding-dong...ding-dong. </span> </em> </strong>
</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. What You Did...</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>   It wasn't long before Hinata had opened his door to them and stared at them blankly before allowing them entry. Not wanting to be beating around the bush, the ex-Yakuza stood in front of Hinata and counted backward in his head before he started his questioning. ”Alright, be honest with us, Hajime. Why? And don't you fucking dare ask why what. Just why did you do what you did to Nagito? Explain yourself, from beginning to end.”</p><p>And so began the long explanation. He patiently waited for Hinata to finish his story. Never once interrupting. From the beginning and until the very end and the more he heard, the more he became furious. Not just at Hinata but at Byakuya, the Future Foundation, and so much more. But his anger was still mainly targeted at Hajime for turning his growing burning hatred for the Future Foundation onto a man that was supposed to be his partner. His one and only heart. He found it completely unaccepted. He may have been from the Yakuza, but even they had morals. </p><p>Upon hearing the reasons behind Hjnata’s actions, Kuzuryuu had immediately discarded what he had said earlier. ’Fuck what I said about rational and calm, I'm not mature enough to not use violence after all.’ He thought as he successfully connected his fist with Hinata’s face but couldn't find it within himself to feel satisfied. After the action was done and over with, he knew that the other boy had simply allowed himself to get punched. There was no absolute doubt in his mind that Hinata could've easily avoided it. </p><p>The mere fact of the matter only added fuel to his burning rage, and before anything else can happen, he was rightfully being dragged away by Peko. ”You think that's an excuse!? Don't you dare fuck with me!!”</p><p>His single eye staring down at Hajime, he felt an intense, overwhelming level of disgust, disappointment, and anger boil within him. He couldn't believe this. He just fucking couldn’t believe this shit. Hinata Hajime, his friend, his brother, his leader, was supposed to be better than this! ”I never said it was an excuse.” Came the calm response, Hajime didn't even attempt at soothing his slightly reddened cheek. He merely stared at them, emotionless eyes tired that was slightly ridden with sadness. An emotion that Fuyuhiko felt like Hajime had no right to have.</p><p>He wasn’t the victim.</p><p>Pulling away from the girl, he stalked back over. Hands clenched tight by his side, a testament to his resolve to not resort to violence again and properly restrain himself from attacking this time. The more he stared at Hajime. The more he felt as if someone had sullied his favorite hero’s name, only that those words rang true and felt a stab of pain in his chest. ”Nobody is ever going to be able to trust you again with Nagito. Not after this. You aren't going to have it easy either. Not from us and especially not for him. I don't give a fuck what Nagito said. He shouldn't be looking out for you still. Not after what you did.”</p><p>His words cut deep, and he knew it hit a sore spot when he saw Hinata allow a single tear to trail down before it was followed by multiple tears and small barely audio sounds of gasping breath and choked sobs reached his ears. ”What...what did he say.”</p><p>Turning away from the other, Fuyuhiko sighed tirelessly and cruelly added salt to the wound. Knowing what his next set of words would do to the other. ”Don't abandon you and that you still need us to guide you or some shit. I’ll never understand him and his unappalled love for you. You hurt him, damage him even. Yet he's still finding it within his heart to care and want the best for you. It really pisses me off. It’s already bad enough that he honestly thinks that his existence doesn’t matter and that his body only has to serve some type of use. But after the shit, you pulled. He might go spiraling down into insanity and despair again and automatically associate what you did to his body as him serving his use and purpose!! It’s sick!!” Panting now at having to yell the last sentence, Fuyuhiko straightened himself up and risked a glance at Peko and saw that she was surprised by his outburst.<em>‘Damn, that fucker for making me worry about him and especially, making me think of all the possible setbacks this might have on his psyche. More importantly...when the fuck did I start caring for the bastard?’ </em></p><p>Knowing that while he still had his thought somewhat coherent enough in his raging rant. Fuyuhiko continues on. “As much as I thought I'll never say this since I always thought it was the other way around. But I’ve been proven wrong more times than I can count since I came to this damn island, I just never expect to be proven wrong on this. You...you don't deserve him. You never will. He's protecting you but still allowing you to face some kind of light ass punishment. Which is utter bullshit. To me, he's too fucking merciful. After all, no matter how you word it. What you did was rape. You repeatedly raped a boy that loved...well loves you with his heart and soul. He's forever going to have that trauma because of you. No one but yourself can obliviate that. You will never be in a relationship with him again because of your foolishness, but you damn well can become an associate if he allows it. Only he. If I was you, I'd take what I can get.”</p><p>Leaving him with those parting words. Fuyuhiko and Pekoyama stepped out to hear a scream of frustration and pain a second later as the door closed firmly behind them. ”Will he be okay?”</p><p>Not having an answer for his girlfriend, he took her hand and headed back to their cottage. Getting the hint, Peko squeezed his hand comfortingly. After all, she of all people knew how her boyfriend viewed Hajime and to be shown and to even hear that your brother and hero-like figure had committed such an atrocious action such as rape. It was devastating.</p><p>It must have shattered him deep down inside. But yet again, she knew that he possibly couldn't show it. Not now at all.</p><p>He was the unofficial second in command, and right now, he needed to be strong. If not for them, then for himself.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>You know...I’ve been toying with the idea of adding the Mpreg tag. How do you guys feel about it? Don’t worry about how I’ll make it possible to incorporate it into the story. Just tell me how you feel about mpreg? Or would you prefer if it was Alpha/Omega story in order for me to even use mpreg?</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Lost My Way...</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>  For the past couple of days under Mikan's care, Komaeda has been under constant surveillance and was strictly required to have two-three weeks of bed rest. From her thorough examination, she was able to find more than enough reason to commend her classmate to bedrest. It had taken numerous conversations held between Mikan and Nagito about him checking himself out before she <em>‘sweetly’ </em>stated that she wouldn’t hesitate to get Nidai, Owari, or Kuzuryuu to guard and restrain him should he so much as attempt to escape treatment and the necessary amount of rest that his body desperately needed. </p><p>Thinking back to a point in time when the Ultimate Nurse couldn't even form a proper sentence without becoming a stuttering mess to the firm, strong and more confident woman she is now, made Nagito smile despite the minimal amount of irritation he felt toward her currently. He was genuinely happy that she was firmer and more outspoken, but now at this exact moment, that same feeling of happiness for her growth came and bit him in the ass when he did attempt at one point to escape. Only for her to carry through with her threat. Though luckily for him, unlucky for the other, since it had been Fuyuhiko job to fetch him and not Nekomaru or Akane.</p><p>So without much to do, he had gotten comfortable in his temporary room within the hospital, finding it was surprisingly spacious for a hospital room. He even had a decently sized bathroom too. But never once did he spare a look at his reflection whenever he went to the bathroom. He was scared of what he might see if he looked. So after weeks, which turned into almost a full month, he began to experiences fainting spells by the middle of the second week and other peculiar symptoms. Finding himself just a bit curious on how he looked now, he gained the courage and found himself in the bathroom.</p><p>Staring hard at the reflection that stared back at him in the mirror. At the person, he hardly even recognized himself. Cause staring back at him was a small, frail porcelain face, with noticeable dark circles underneath grey-green eyes and wavy white hair that now reached a bit below his chest. It wasn’t neat or straight, and nowhere near the length, he remembers it being from a few weeks ago. Though he was wearing a hospital gown, it effortlessly swallowed his body and felt more than three times too big around his delicate figure. It was making him constantly readjust the robe as much as he can to make it somewhat presentable around his body. </p><p>When he was satisfied with what he got, he hesitantly reached up a bony and frail hand to delicately twirl a piece of his hair. '<em>Is this...me? Is this me? I look…I didn’t even know that my hair can grow that long.’ </em></p><p>There was a soft knock at the door, and before he knew it, Mikan and Sonia entered the room. Seeing them in the mirror's reflection, he turned to face them and tilted his head curiously at the sight of Sonia. Noticing the stare, the ex-princess smiled pleasantly. “I’m glad to see you up and about, Komaeda-San. How are you feeling?”</p><p>There was genuine sincerity within her question and for the life of him, instead of giving her a sarcastic remark or adding any haunting ness to his words. He decided to answer honestly as he could. Knowing that it was for the best and that she truly meant no harm to him. That didn’t mean he had to tell her everything. “I’m doing a bit better. Still feeling faint here and there. But with Tsumiki here, I’ll be better in no time.” Narrowing her eyes at what he said, Mikan discreetly looked at Sonia and saw that she too knew that he wasn’t as honest as he should but kept up the act.</p><p>“That’s wonderful!” She exclaimed. Her blue eyes spark with happiness cause really, she was happy that he was doing better. “Hopefully, you’ll have a full recovery in no time.”</p><p>“That is preferable. So Mikan, what’s for today’s meal plan?” Nagito couldn’t help but ask. Smiling softly, Tsumiki began to tell him what his meal plan was looking at for today.</p><p> </p><p>~With Hajime. Hotel.~</p><p> </p><p>Walking into the hotel, Hajime went up the stairs and was greeted with an eerie silence and multiple pairs of disapproving stares from his peers, causing him to square his shoulders. He’s been actively avoiding them for the past couple of weeks, timing their breakfast, lunch, and dinner perfectly so whenever he was hungry. He could sneak in and grab something real quick to eat and go. </p><p>However, he knew that he couldn’t avoid them forever. So with his mind made up, he decided it was about time he faced the music. He had enough time to recover and think over his mistakes. </p><p>With his chin held high, he pretended that he was strong enough to deal with their hateful glares and unspoken judgment.</p><p>He hadn’t expected Souda to sit right in front of him after he got his food and sat far away from the others as he ate. “Now before you think that I’m going to pretend and think that everything is fine dandy and I’m going to ask this. Tell me...what made you stop exactly?”</p><p>Even though he didn’t specify what he meant, Hinata knew exactly what he meant. There were many what made you stop, questions Kazuichi could’ve implied.</p><p>What made him stop abusing Komaeda? What made him stop lying about Komaeda being fine? What made you since he could’ve easily persuaded them into believing that Nagito was lying and they would’ve believed him since it was him, Hinata Hajime, their leader? What made him stop since he had the power to continue with abuse and would’ve been none the wiser? It was everything in that single question disguised as many well-hidden questions.</p><p>Putting his fork down, Hinata stared into Kazuichi’s eyes. Noting the seriousness in them. No longer was Souda Kazuichi a screaming scaredy-cat of a teen. But a man. He wasn’t afraid of what his answer may be. He was determined on how to move forward, depending on the answer. It was then that Hajime knew that his answer shouldn’t be a half-assed response or a lie. But the honest truth, so he told him.</p><p>“I broke him. I broke what the only good thing in my life was. I saw him cry...not because of the bruises, not because of the night of intimacy we shared. He cried...because of me. I never meant to hurt him. I'll be honest with you, it was like it wasn't even me. But at the same time, it was. It's no excuse and never will be my excuse. I don't know if this is a satisfactory answer for you or anyone that's listening. But it's my answer."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>So I've decided to add the mpreg tag after much consideration and carefully thought out planning for future chapters. Just like every chapter before this one. This chapter will be undergoing revision if I feel like I can improve it. </p><p>I might also slow down on updates just so I can make sure that these chapters aren't just being half-assed.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. The Unwavering...</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>   Souda Kazuichi was many things, but he liked to believe he turned into a fair, level-headed, and reasonable person after much guidance from his friends after everything they've been through. He wanted, no need to know, what had tipped his soul friend, who was usually such a reserve and tactical person into performing such a heinous act. He wanted to believe that everything was a lie. To believe that everything was just a bad dream. But staring in front of him wasn't a figment of his imagination or hallucination. What stared back at him was the cold reality of the current situation at hand. He would give everything for this to be a sick joke. Anything honestly.</p><p>He felt sick knowing that his friend could do such an act. </p><p>Rape.</p><p>Because it was what it was, after everything that was discussed between everyone minus Hajime and Komaeda, of course. From Mikan’s examination and from Komaeda isolation and damaged psyche. Hajime had been quite forceful.</p><p>So there he was trying to uphold his strong front as he confronted Hinata, a person he genuinely cares about and sees as his friend. He needed answers; he needed to know how to proceed. Because he honestly knew that things couldn't be the same between them or even between Hajime and everyone else.</p><p>But once he heard his answer, he could only stare blankly as Hajime got up and left once he had given his answer.</p><p> </p><p>~The following day. Sonia &amp; Mikan, Location; Hospital.~</p><p> </p><p>Leaning slightly forward in her chair with one leg crossed over the other, Sonia stared at the Ultimate Nurse. Her sharp blue eyes are glaring holes into the nurse. “He’s...having fainting spells? Is that even normal for someone of his condition?”</p><p>Sighing softly to herself, Mikan slumped back in her chair and massaged the bridge of her nose. She thought for a moment to herself to gather her thoughts before she answered truthfully. “Actually, no. He’s in a fragile state, yes. But with the limited amount of activity that I have him doing. It shouldn’t trigger any sort of fainting spells. There's also the case of him being extremely tired lately. Not to mention the fact that he could barely hold down food now. I have an idea of what it could be, but I want to be wrong, but I’m barely <em><span class="u">ever</span></em> wrong in my hunches.”</p><p>“How can you be? You are, after all, the Ultimate Nurse. Someone with your talent, miscalculations would seem very far and in between. Not saying that it’s not possible, but with what you’ve done so far. It seems highly unlikely. Very unlikely, in fact.” Sonia said she, too, also had an idea of what the problem could be. </p><p>With the extensive guidance she received from her royal instructors to her friends, the former princess had the gracious opportunity to spend every waking moment of her time to further her education and social interaction and social cues. The time she spent studying from her instructors covered everything in her country from languages to politics during her time as her people’s princess. Combine with the time she spent with Mikan and Hajime and the others, she was quite knowledgeable in a lot of aspects. Especially in the medical field, thanks to Mikan. It also helps that if Mikan ever needed a break, she can very well take one since she taught Sonia everything she knew.</p><p>It was then at that exact moment that Fuyuhiko, along with Peko, came inside. “So, how is he?” The sword woman asked. She crossed her arms under her breast and stood beside her former young master. After being with them for an extended period, Peko slowly began to loosen up bit by bit and became even playful in a sense. Though she still retained her serious persona when the situation called for it. Like now, for example.</p><p>Taking to rubbing her temples now. Mikan gave them what she hoped was a reassuring smile. But it was clear that it wasn’t fooling them, judging by their slight frowns. So all she could do was frown in return and furrow her eyebrows slightly as she thought about her answer. It was a delicate matter. “He could be better. But there’s something very unusual...he’s going through certain symptoms that he shouldn’t. I have an idea of what it is.” She shared a look with Sonia and knew that the other had the same trail of thoughts she did.</p><p>It wasn’t lost to the two new additional people in the room that saw the look they shared. Fuyuhiko sighed, already feeling the world's weight on his shoulders as it seemed more and more problems were arising. So with another tired sigh and more than willing to bite the bullet. He decided to ask the dreaded question. That he was sure that Peko also wanted to ask as well. “Just what exactly is your idea, Mikan?”</p><p>Not being able to face them, the nurse looked away. “...My theory is that maybe...just maybe that Komaeda-san is pregnant.”</p><p>It was silent, and before they knew it, they heard a scoff, and the ex-Yakuza pissed off voice a second later. “Are you fucking with us, Tsumiki. Cause if you are, it’s not funny. Not even in the fucking slightest damn it.”</p><p>Shaking her head, Mikan began listing off the symptoms Nagito was experiencing. “He’s experiencing fainting spells, not to mention not being able to hold down food for a long period of time, which causes him to throw up. He's also been exhausted as of late. I don’t even want to go into what he could be hiding from us, from me. He's even been complaining and feeling nauseous about the smell of the food I’ve been giving him.”</p><p>“But how?” Peko decided to ask, her voice may have sounded calm to untrained ears but after being with the girl for a duration of the Neo World and spending time on the actual island. Everyone now knew how to identify everyone’s distress cues. The girls and Fuyuhiko were able to hear the very slight way her voice had wavered. “He is, after all, a man.”</p><p>“My only guess is Junko. Enoshima Junko. From the medical recorders and personal profile that the Future Foundation provided for me, I ruled out the possibility of him being transgender or having a sex change.” Mikan said seriously. Her face was hard as she finally turned towards them.</p><p>“So what you’re saying is...Junko left one more fuck you present for us. Well, more certainly for Komaeda Nagito.” Fuyuhiko snarled. </p><p>“However, I want to be sure. I just don’t want to believe she would do something like this. But this is Junko. I...I wouldn’t put it past her either.” Running a hand through her hair, Mikan sighed once again. “I want to be wrong. Not because I don’t like the idea of one of us having kids. I..-”</p><p>Knowing what she was going to say, Sonia grabbed her hand and gave her a reassuring squeeze. “You’re worried about Nagito’s psyche. Aren’t you?”</p><p>Nodding Tsumiki bowed her head, her bangs that were even and straight now, which successfully hid her eyes from sight and creating a shadow. But what that did hide, didn’t hide the slight shake of her body as she cried. “...I’m worried that this will break him. That this...will be the final nail in the coffin. Hajime didn’t mean to break him, and I can see it in his eyes that he didn’t mean too. But that doesn’t mean what he did was right. It doesn’t mean that Nagito is ready for the consequences of Junko’s and Hinata’s actions.”</p><p>Getting up and out of her seat, Sonia came over to the nurse and pulled her into a comforting hug. As she did that, she gave the two former Yakuza members a nervous smile and had politely motioned for them to come back later. To which they complied. “Listen, I know. I know Mikan what you mean. But right now, we just need to confirm our theory. We can handle Hinata later. As for Junko...well, she’s gone. There’s no undoing her actions. So all we can do now is pick up the pieces. We will do our best to be there for Komaeda-san and if he breaks. Well, we will be there to support him. We may not have been close or fond of him. But he’s our classmate and classmates should be there for each other, right? Who knows, maybe this unfortunate situation just might be the thing to bring us all together.”</p><p>Sniffing Mikan returned her embrace and nodded. “You’re right. Let’s just hope for the best.”</p><p>“Do you want me to be there when you examine him?” Sonia asked. She gently began to thread her fingers through Mikan’s hair, further calming the girl down. It was nice.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Like every chapter before this, a revision will be made. I hope you like this chapter and the slow build-up, I'm giving to each character.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. News...</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>There was just no way around it. </p><p>Anyhow she looked at the situation, Mikan knew she couldn't possibly hide what she was going to do. To confirm her growing suspicion of what was wrong with her patient. She had to check. Despite being acutely aware that there was a ninety-nine percent chance that Komaeda would immediately catch on, there was no way around it.</p><p>After all, Nagito was an astute individual, highly intelligent even. Far ahead of their peers and even herself. She wasn't naive and refused to be so. There was no denying that the chances of Komaeda finding out were high. She already had this sinking feeling that he was going to figure out what she was doing, within the first few seconds or even already have his suspicions based on what's going on with him.</p><p>So with as much confidence as she currently felt, she squared her shoulders and glanced over to her right and saw Sonia. Who offered her a smile before she slowly sipped some of the orange juice from her glass cup.</p><p>The former princess stood by, watching as the nurse loaded the small trolley with food and drinks. “Don't be nervous. We have to tell him. It is his body, and so he has the right to know. If what’s happening to him is actually the reality we will be facing in eight months. He will start to show.”</p><p>With her task done, the nurse fumbled with her hands and sighed tirelessly, and inwardly agreed. The situation they found themselves working with, had her nerves in shambles and they haven’t even started yet. “I know, I know it’s just that I don’t know how to exactly…”<br/>Finishing her sentence, Sonia's smile turned into a slight grimace. The only thing that gave away her displeasure. “How to go about telling him, correct?”</p><p>“Yeah. This is Komaeda-san, after all.” Closing her eyes, Mikan counted to ten in her head and reopened them and stared into Sonia’s own blue hues. “Okay, I believe I’m ready.”</p><p>Heading to Komaeda’s room was a small and concise journey since his room was down the hall and around the corner, but they eventually found themselves in front of his door. With a firm nod towards each other, Mikan politely knocked on the door and waited patiently for permission for entry. Once fifteen seconds have gone by, and she still hadn't received a response, she knocked again, this time slightly louder than the last knock. When there was still no response, she shot a worried glance to the former heiress and saw that she too was also slightly concerned. As they specifically choose to come at this time because it was around the time that Komaeda would usually be up on his own. But now that he wasn’t responding, it was beginning to worry them significantly. </p><p>Twisting the knob and opening the door, they were greeted to the sight of Komaeda propped up, sitting up in his bed facing the window. But what made them stiffen was the way he had one hand positioned over his belly, rubbing it as he hummed softly to himself. </p><p>Knowing that someone entered his room since he heard the door and the insistent knocks prior. Nagito stopped humming and faced them, upon realizing who was in front of him. He looked at them with a sad and defeated smile. His shoulders were slumps, and his hand rested delicately on his stomach. His eyes told them everything they needed to know. <br/>He knew.</p><p>“...Nagito…” Sonia started. But stopped short, at a clear and obvious loss on what to say next. It was clear that he knew something, and that sinking feeling was back.</p><p>“...I’m pregnant, aren’t I?”</p><p>The shattered glass's sound pierced the air as the girls stood stock still inside the doorway in disbelief. The orange juice began to spread rapidly on the floor, while the glass cup was shattered upon impact and laid on the floor. Thousands of pieces of glass yet remained there forgotten as the two women stared at Nagito, neither taking notice of the mess.</p><p>“Komaeda-san-” Sonia tried again but stopped as Komaeda held up his hand, effectively silencing the girl. </p><p>”...I’ve had my suspicion…you were going to confirm your own suspicion, weren't you, Mikan?” Komaeda asked. Despite the revelation of the situation, his tone was oddly polite as he stared at the nurse curiously. He wasn't openly showing his fears, but they could see it. His eyes were becoming quite expressive, and it’s been helping them determine if he was honest or not. Like right now, for example. There was an underlying fear within his grey-green eyes.</p><p>A mutual fear shared between the three if their theories were proven right.</p><p>Swallowing the lump that suddenly seemed to have lodged inside her throat. Mikan allowed a single tear to cascade down her face. The only sign that this was as hard for her as it was for him. To confirm his own speculation. It was transparent. That this was bothering him as much as it bothers her. “Yes, Komaeda-san.”</p><p>But in like every situation that the man found himself in. He kept himself oddly composed and smiled despite everything that screamed that this was wrong. </p><p>With the confirmation he needed, Nagito leaned further back in his bed and closed his eyes. ”I'm ready when you are.”</p><p>"Let's get some food in you first before we move on to the examination room, Komaeda-san.” Deciding to make the nurse job easier, Komaeda opened his eyes and sat up straighter. While Mikan carefully assembles his food together from the trolley and Sonia excused herself to get a mop, broom, and dustpan to clean up the mess she made. “...I’m...sorry.”</p><p>Looking at her blanking before blinking slowly, Nagito allowed what he hoped was a ‘motherly’ look to pass over his face. He spoke as softly and as gently as he could to her. “You have nothing to apologize for. This isn't your fault and never will be.” And it was true. She had done nothing to earn his forgiveness or pay tribute. She was innocent.</p><p>“...I-” “You have done nothing but take care of me, Mikan. If it wasn’t for you...or Hinata-san, I wouldn’t be alive right now.” If Mikan notices the change in horrific in the name he used for Hajime or the fact that he was referring to his ex-boyfriend by his last name, she said nothing, and for that, he couldn’t be more grateful.<br/> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Same old same old. Will revise if needed.</p><p>I used ‘motherly’ because Nagito is going to be a ‘mother’ and wants to have that look down pact for his future child.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. Mother...</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>   If you were to ask people approximately two and a half years ago what they think of Hinata Hajime, they would instantly be reminded of a sarcastic reserve student with a tactical mindset, someone who wasn't naive but instead quite skeptical about anything and everything that seemed slightly off-putting. He was a person that wasn’t easily swayed by others either but could become just the slightest bit submissive if people become too bossy for his liking. </p><p>But when people hear about him now, the only thing that stands out above all is the fact that he became the official leader of the former Remnant of Despair. The one who saw reason, and could be ruthless and vicious if needed but was otherwise a benevolent and patient leader to those under his protection and command.</p><p>Kamukaru Izuru, on the other hand, had people that truly feared him when they first heard of him, some thought of him as nothing more than an abomination. Others thought he was the perfect human, with outstanding abilities that surpass human capabilities with an immense alarming amount of rage that he harbors for his former handlers. He was a fast and inhumanly strong and highly prospective person. But now, to people that do know him, they know that he is not perfect and not an emotionally invested person. A flawed individual believes that there’s no room for him to grow or seek anything because he knows everything. Perfect but imperfect since everything comes to him naturally. Leaving him with a sense of boredom and lackluster excitement that couldn't feel the void of feeling like a human.</p><p>With them combined and living as one singularity, they were unique. An enigma in all terms of science. They were human but genetically not. Body altered and twisted by men and women who decided to play god and make the ultimate human when creating Kamukura while using Hinata as his vessel. With their combined souls, they became a person residing in one body. Neither Hajime or Izuru. But something else. Still, Hajime but still Izuru. It was an overly complicated and complex state of affairs that often led to not just them but others being entirely at odds and vex about how they came to be. Neither knew who they truly were but knew they existed and were real people with emotions, memories, and personalities. Both with a soul and conscious living as one entity.</p><p>But what neither realizes is that by combining their souls, they made something entirely else. A third entity that was still neither Hajime or Izuru, but someone else. Someone that shouldn’t possibly exist. It is them but also not them. The Hajime before the Kamukura Izuru is gone. Forever to be comatose within his own body, while a new person emerged from the project, Izuru. When he underwent the Neo World, he too became comatose, but unlike the original Hajime, it was only temporary. </p><p>Thus creating the new Hinata Hajime that appeared in the Neo World. </p><p>Izuru, having gone over every possible explanation for their sudden impulsive behavior, flinched slightly with their subconscious of Hajime’s mind. His mind came to one conclusion that made sense and desperately searched within Hajime’s mind. It took him a while, but he was able to pinpoint it.<em> '<span class="u">Found you.’ </span> </em></p><p> <em>'<span class="u">I didn’t think it was possible, nor did either I or Hajime sensed your presence. Who exactly are you?’ </span></em></p><p> </p><p>~With Komaeda, Sonia, &amp; Mikan. Hospital examination room.~</p><p> </p><p>Delicately cleaning her patient’s stomach and placing the cold gel-like substance upon his belly with a warning that it may feel cold.</p><p>Even with the warning, Nagito flinched at the coldness of the gel as Mikan applied the perfect amount and went to get the Doppler. ”Are you ready?”</p><p>Nodding Komaeda briefly looked over to Sonia and saw that she was unsurprisingly invested in watching the scene unfold. Pressing the Doppler carefully to Komaeda’s stomach, Mikan slowly began searching and stopped once she heard a heartbeat, and the grainy image on the project screen showed a small jelly bean-like object. “...I was right.” Turning to face Nagito, she saw that his eyes were trained entirely on the small little thing. “There’s your baby, Nagito.”</p><p>The Ultimate Nurse expected many things to appear in the Ultimate Luckster face. Anger. Happiness. Pain. Maybe even a combination of all three. But what she wasn’t expecting was for Komaeda to make the saddest face she's ever seen as tears began streaming down his face. “Komaeda-san...are you okay?” She knew it was a stupid question to ask because he was obviously not okay, but she had to ask.</p><p>“...I’m just sad...that a child was made under these current circumstances, ya know?” He flashed her a broken smile, and it became painfully clear what he meant. </p><p>A baby born from rape.</p><p>A baby, innocent and pure but would be totally unaware of the amount of stress she/he would put on their singular parent. The parent that carries them, it’s the mother. The mother that was raped.</p><p>A baby who couldn’t decide their parent or choose to come into existence because of the lack of a condom and knowledge that parent could even become a parent with a situation like his. A baby that is supposed to be a blessing became something more. It was something that she couldn't possibly understand but had sort of an idea of what Komaeda was going through. “...I still want this child...I refuse to kill an innocent life because of the circumstances. ‘They’ didn’t get to experience life yet, who am I. To take away their chance at life. I know it's going to be hard, but just like how I had the right to know. Hinata-san has the right to know too. After all, it is because of him that I’m currently pregnant. He is the father.”</p><p>“But that doesn’t mean you have to tell him right away! You can request for Makoto-san to take you to the mainland and get help there.” Sonia said, her eyes burning bright and daring the lucky student to argue with her. But like her, he was just as stubborn and stared at her calmly. </p><p>“If I don’t tell him. I’ll never find the courage to. The worst way for him to find out is if I start showing or have Makoto-san take me away from here without an explanation.” Closing his eyes, the boy relaxed and allowed his body to go boneless in the chair. “Makoto-san...he’s a nice person. But he’s noisy. He will end up confronting Hinata-san, and just by that confrontation, the beans will be out if I had him take me away. This...this is the only way. I don’t want him to hear it from someone else. It has to come from me.”</p><p>“Besides, I’ve never been one to run away from my problems. And I’m not going to start now.” There was a firm resolution within his eyes, and neither the former princess or nurse could say anything to oppose. But they made one thing clear, even if it wasn't said out loud. The girls promised themselves that they would be there for Komaeda, every step of the way.</p><p>Because it was obvious despite his strong front. </p><p>Nagito needed them.  </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Tell me whatcha think?</p><p>Second, going on a short hiatus to write up more chapters. Probably be back in about two weeks. Maybe less. I wanna write about four to five good chapters before I start back updating again.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0018"><h2>18. Questions...</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Will revise and answer comments.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>  Standing within their shared mindscape, Izuru forcefully pulled the unknown entity to his location. His long hair flowing behind him as his red eyes pinned the man that had the same face as him and Hajime. But instead of red eyes or green eyes or even a combination of one red and green eyes. What greeted him were blazing yellow hues and waist-length black-brown hair. “<em><span class="u">Who are you?” </span> </em></p><p>Smirking the stranger scoff. <em>"<span class="u">Isn’t it obvious?” </span> </em></p><p><em> <span class="u"> “You know exactly what I meant.” </span> </em>  Izuru felt a brief flare of irritation at the other's insolent. However, the feeling disappeared as soon as it began but he was able to deduce what the feeling was. He was seconds away from pulling Hajime into their mindscape to deal with the nuisance. But knew that he, himself needed to be there. Despite desperately wanting to push the task of dealing with the other onto Hajime’s more capable hands. <em><span class="u">“A</span><span class="u">re you the one that’s been hurting Nagito?” </span></em></p><p><em> <span class="u"> “Oh, what gave it away? The fact that neither you nor Hajime wouldn’t dare hurt a single hair on his head or that I’m the only one that seems capable of influencing your however brief control. Cause let’s be honest. You two are too soft, and don’t have it in you to train the-” </span> </em> Suddenly, the entity found himself held up his throat, fiery-red eyes blazing as a singular handheld him up tightened painfully. Choking him and making his words lodge in his throat.</p><p><em> <span class="u"> “If I were you, I would retract that statement. Nagito isn’t a dog. Nor is he a slave or servant that needs training.” </span></em> Izuru stated. Even though his voice had been emotionless, his eyes spoke for him. It showed his fury.</p><p>Not being able to say a thing, all the entity could do was release a choked sound from within his throat.</p><p>Suddenly with seconds, Hinata materialized before them and was able to decipher the situation within seconds.<em> "<span class="u">So, he's the one?” </span> </em></p><p><em> <span class="u"> ”Affirmative.” </span> </em>Leading Hajime to frown as he stared at the third personality. He slowly approached them and gently placed his hand on Kamukura’s arm, understanding what he wanted. Izuru dropped the boy, resulting in him falling on his hands and knees as he panted. His left hand shot up to his throat to gently hold and then massage it. Feeling bruises began to blossom over his neck from the deadly grip as he tried to ease the pain. </p><p><em> <span class="u"> “Did you have to choke him?” </span> </em> Hajime asked, his eyes trained on the boy before them. Cold and emotionless red eyes also stared at the boy too.</p><p><em> <span class="u"> “Naturally...You would too... if you heard what he said.”  </span> </em>Causing Hinata to sigh, he didn’t want to know what the other said to make Kamukaru react like that. But he had a feeling that it involved the one only to own their heart entirely and successfully.</p><p>He knew that if he heard what was said. His reaction would be far worse than Kamukaru’s ever would be. So for their sake and his own, he simply shook the thoughts away and decided to direct his attention to the problem at hand.</p><p>Izuru could only stare at him, having an idea of his train of thoughts and sighed tirelessly. "<em><span class="u">Who are you?” </span> </em> Hajime asked, his voice piercing through the silence and demanding attention. </p><p>"<em><span class="u">Do you even need an answer? Use your brain. Who else could I possibly be? I'm you.” </span> </em></p><p> </p><p>~With Nagito.~</p><p> </p><p>A stressed sigh passes through Nagito’s lips, his eyes trained on the outside world of his window while his remaining hand laid gently on his stomach. He was finally alone and back within the comfort of his own in his room within the hospital, with the promise of Sonia and Mikan visiting every few hours to check upon him, and right now, he couldn’t be more thankful for the alone time. Because he felt that now would be more than a good enough time to see if he could finally gather his thoughts.</p><p>He felt emotionally drained, but what was surprising enough, he felt that despite it all. He was handling things far too well, which concerned him greatly.</p><p>And as much as he would like to think that he had a grasp on the situation, he didn’t. He found that everything that he went through within his own rights should be impossible, but given the fact that he had witnessed and saw the odds stacked against him when he was ‘luck’ was ‘activated’. He couldn’t be so sure. He wanted to believe that everything up till now has been a dream, another virtual reality even. Maybe then he could make sense of it. But the more he thought and thought, he knew that this wasn’t a dream but his reality. Which begs the question of how.</p><p>How was it possible? How did Junko do it? How was the baby even still alive when he wasn’t even supposed to have the same functions that a woman would need to conceive? How and when did she do it? How had he never even noticed that something was wrong? There were so many how’s and not enough why’s. Like why would she do? Why would it even cross her mind to do it? Why him and what would she have gained from him being able to reproduce in the first place. There were so many unanswered questions that needed answers, but sadly(fortunately), the person in question was undeniably dead and couldn’t possibly rise from the grave to even answer them. </p><p>It was a mess, and he knew it. There was also the topic of Hajime, and he visibly flinched when his name popped up in his head. Hajime-Hinata was another can of questions. He knew that logically another person was residing within Hajime but within that line of thinking. There was the fact that despite knowing who else was residing within that body, the actions that were done to his body didn’t properly align with the two people sharing the body personality. In fact, neither Hinata or Kamukaru would never so much as harm him, let alone be rough with him. After all, it was common knowledge that even though Kamukaru and Hajime were physically stronger, they would never abuse that attribute and demean a person’s worth. The Hinata that he was dealing with had. Which didn't make sense, since once again Hinata made it known that he was a gentle soul that only wanted honesty. </p><p>Which served the purpose of logical thinking. When it all boils down to it, logically, there could be an explanation for the change. Reasonably there just has to be something that is missing to cause such a drastic change overnight. Yet, the more he thought, the more he found himself with very few plausible answers. One of which, he has thought for a long time since it started. ‘What if...what if when he woke up, Kamukaru wasn’t the only personality that had awakened within Hajime’s mindscape. But if that begs the case...why would it make itself known now is the question.’ A question that knew he would never know unless he asked. </p><p>But the very thought of confronting or even having to ask the other left an unsettling feeling in his stomach. </p><p>It was a thought that led down to a shiver running up and down his spine. An idea that maybe shouldn’t have been so terrifying because it was still another piece of Hinata. But yet, it was that same piece that ultimately hurt him in the end, and he didn’t know what to think once his mind got started.</p><p>A piece that Hinata had no control over if the very possibility of a third personality was entirely possible given the facts that slowly but surely started to piece itself together. Which begged to two last questions.</p><p>How much control did that personality have to subdue Hinata and Hajime into thinking that everything in the outside world was fine? </p><p>And why did it seem so keen on hurting him?</p><p>A knock interrupted his musing before he could dwell any further with his chain of thought.</p><p>“Hey, Komaeda! It’s me...Kazuichi!”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>The plot is thickening...damn this is really a slow build even for me.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0019"><h2>19. Unexpected visitor...</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Usually, I avoid speaking out and creating unnecessary negativity. But sometimes some authors need to know how to handle criticism or even a comment that’s just genuinely curious. It doesn’t hurt to not sound condescending and to just simply correct a reader cause at the end of the day. It was a question. </p><p>And a question is a question. </p><p>People need to understand that even if you do the research, things will vary depending on the person. No one will truly know the correct information since everyone is different. I can't emphasize this enough. So that being said, I love each and every comment. And I’m looking forward to seeing this story through. Even if I still trying to figure out where to go with this story honestly. At the end of the day, you (my readers) are here with me on this journey. From start to finish. So with that being said, let’s start the chapter.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Hey Komaeda, it’s me...Kazuichi.”</p><p>Eyes wide, as he was caught off guard by the unsuspected visitor. Komaeda sighed softly as he suddenly found himself feeling slightly exhausted despite not dealing with the young mechanic antics just yet. He was tempted to pretend that he was merely asleep in order to avoid the other but felt that it would be too rude and ingenuine. He also ruled out the option of sending Kazuichi away as he knew that the other could be quite persistent when he wanted to be. So before he could second guess himself into rethinking this over, he granted the engineer permission for entry in hopes that the other wouldn’t be here to chat for too long.</p><p>“Ah, Kazuichi-san. You may come in.” The doorknob turned with a slight and barely audio creak, and slowly light began pouring in from the hallway lights once the door was fully pushed open. </p><p>And there, Kazuichi stood, grinned happily as he walked into the room with surprisingly quiet footsteps. “Yo!”</p><p>“Well...isn’t this a surprise.” Nagito couldn’t help but comment out loudly, watching as the man dragged a chair closer to his bed before plopping down into the old metal chair. </p><p>“I hope it was a pleasant one, though.” Now that he was faced with the other, Kazuichi took the time to take in the other’s appearance silently. And what stared back at him was shocking. Dark eye bags hung beneath grey-green eyes, and paler than usual skin greeted him, and if he was completely honest with himself. Kazuichi still found the other to be unnervingly pretty despite those minor and temporary flaws that could be quickly taken care of with much-needed sleep. <em>‘He’s just as pretty as Miss Sonia.’ </em></p><p>“What are you looking at?” Snapping out of his state of stupor, Kazuichi realizes with growing bleak horror that he had been caught staring at the white-haired boy for quite some time now without even saying anything.</p><p>“N-nothing! Nothing at all.” Not entirely being convinced, Komaeda furrowed his brows a bit for a second and then slightly bit his bottom lip once he released the tension in his forehead. </p><p>“That was totally unconvincing…” Looking away from the other, as he decided to let the obvious lie go. Komaeda found himself wondering about his ex-lover. “Hey, Kazuichi…h-how is Hinata-san,” Nagito asked in a soft and uncertain voice. As if he was scared, even to mention his ex-boyfriend.</p><p>It took Kazuichi a second longer to realize who Komaeda was asking for. Being completely thrown off-guard himself with the sudden change in name and horrific, he had almost forgotten that Hinata was Hajime’s surname. Since he had gotten quite used to referring to other boy by his given name.</p><p>However, what was most surprising to him was Komaeda’s evident fear. But mostly that initial feeling of surprise quickly faded away as he was forcefully reminded why Komaeda acted the way he did once he saw a faded yellow bruise on Komaeda’s neck.<em>‘He has every right to act scared and switch the way he addresses Hajime. I feel so stupid being shock over this. It’s..to be expected, of course.’ </em></p><p>Knowing that he was taking far too long to say anything, Souda answered quickly as he saw Komaeda look back at him. “He’s...not really doing okay if I’m honest. He’s trying to act strong. He knows that he fucked up, and that’s why it’s hitting him so hard.”</p><p>“I see…thank you, Souda-kun.” Confusion took over the engineer’s face. Knowing that he had no idea why he was thanked, Kaizuchi tilted his head and brought his index finger to his cheek sheepishly. </p><p>“...I don’t know why you’re thanking me, but no problem.” Which resulted in Komaeda laughing at his honesty.</p><p>“I’m thanking you for telling me the truth. If I were to ask Sonia or even Mikan, they would have told me not to concern myself with the man and just to focus on myself. So thank you.” Realization registered in Kazuichi’s eyes, and he allowed a small smile to grace his lips. </p><p>“Well, that’s not surprising, isn’t it?” Kazuichi said, his eyes training on Nagito’s grey-green eyes.<em> 'Has his eyes always been this pretty?’ </em></p><p>“Oh, is it?” Komaeda said lightly, his hand picking at the loose thread of his hospital blanket.</p><p>Leaning back in his chair, Kazuichi crosses his arms and smiles once again. This time, it was softer than the last and more gentle. Sincere and refreshing, since every person that walked through the door of his temporary room was either tense or filled with worry. It was nice, and he was glad that even though they have all grown and matured, the engineer kept his cheerful and laid-back attitude, despite his own growth. “Yeah, you went through a traumatic experience. It would be alarming if Mikan or Miss Sonia or anybody for that matter had you focused on your assailant while you’re in the middle of recuperating. Even if it’s Hajime, we won’t allow him near you. The only reason I’m even saying anything is because I know that despite what he did to you. You care about him, love him even. So I’m not against giving you some news about him. As long as it’s within reason. Besides, we can’t hide it forever. The truth will always come out.”</p><p>Getting what he meant, Nagito smiled. “I understand and...thank you.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>On a serious note, for future authors. Please try not to get offended. Some people don’t know how to really word their questions properly. So be patient, be kind and, please be respectful. </p><p>There’s no need to get defensive, especially if they say they love the story but have a genuine question that might not make sense to you. Just calm down and breathe and just explain.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0020"><h2>20. I'm you...isn’t it obvious?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Words that are underlined and italics are the conversations that are happening within Hajime’s mind.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>
    <span class="u"> "You're me?” </span>
  </em>
</p><p><em> <span class="u"> “That’s right!” </span> </em>  Came his rather cheery response, the third Hajime looked at Hinata and Kamukaru with a small and unsettling smirk.  <em> <span class="u"> “You know, for someone who solved all those murder cases, you sure are slow and Kamukaru, I expected much more from you. I’m thoroughly disappointed.” </span> </em></p><p><em> <span class="u"> “Tell me...How did you do it?” </span> </em> It didn’t take a genius to figure out what Izuru meant. All of them knew, and it was further proven when the third Hajime smiled.</p><p>
  <em><span class="u">“Ah...the million-dollar question. The how? Why isn’t it obvious? Think long and hard about what the common theme of every ‘event’ surrounding Nagito’s...experience?” </span>   </em>
</p><p>It wasn’t long before the realization hit Izuru, and when it did, his eyes widened ever so slightly that if one wasn’t paying close enough attention, they would have missed the unusual reaction from the rather stoic man. <em> <span class="u"> “Hajime...was angry.” </span> </em></p><p>
  <em>"<span class="u">Bingo! I’m the complete manifestation of yours and Hajime’s anger and aggression, and hatred. I'm the you that wants to see the world burn. The you that hold so much anger and resentment that it couldn’t possibly be contained just between you two. Therefore I was created. Isn’t that wonderful!” </span>   </em>
</p><p><em> <span class="u"> “No, it is not!” </span> </em> Hajime screamed. His body tense and strung tight. He had enough of this.</p><p>Regarding the other with a calmness that was becoming quite eerily creepy. Izuru tilted his head as if examining a specimen that wasn’t giving him the results he expected. <em><span class="u">“You’re still not telling me how?” </span> </em></p><p><em> <span class="u"> “Be more specific, Izuru; there’s quite a lot of how’s.” </span> </em> </p><p>
  <em>"<span class="u">How were you able to control our actions? We knew we were somewhat aware of what we were doing, but we weren't at the same token. So how?” </span>  </em>
</p><p><em><span class="u">"As I said, I'm a manifestation of your anger. Mind-numbing anger mind you. It can’t just be a simple, quick second anger either. It has to be inexplicable anger, and the one who's ever currently within the room will suffer from it.” </span> </em> This time, there wasn’t a sick grin or smile on the other’s face. Instead, he was frowning as if the entire situation and reasoning of his existence sickened him. He was being serious. Since it was undeniable and unnervingly truthful that they wanted. They can sense that he wasn’t lying in any shape or form.</p><p><em> <span class="u"> “So why, Nagito? Why not hurt him by simply breaking a bone? Anything besides what you did!” </span> </em> Hajime asked.</p><p>
  <em><span class="u">“I knew I didn’t have it in me to hurt him like I would’ve hurt others. So I turned what I could into something else. It doesn’t make sense. I technically shouldn’t care for him in any sense. I’m not emotionally connected to him, not like you and Rapunzel here. I could assure you if it were anybody else. There would’ve been a body bag instead, and you’ll be one friend short.” </span>   </em>
</p><p><em> <span class="u"> "That still doesn’t excuse what you did. No matter what I felt, which directly triggers what you felt, you shouldn’t have taken it out on him.” </span>   </em> </p><p><em> <span class="u"> “You rather me try and kill one of your little friends then?” </span> </em>  Hajime was quiet for that. “ <em> <span class="u"> Didn’t think so. Listen, I can influence what you do with your anger and control your body for that release. You would’ve gone insane if I didn’t. If I would’ve taken over, it would’ve been worse. So be glad that I didn’t. I merely influenced you, which wasn’t hard to do once you're angry and allowed yourself to overcome that feeling. So technically, what I did was just as much as your fault as it was mine.” </span> </em> </p><p>
  <em> <span class="u"> “That’s not tru-“ </span>   </em>
</p><p><em> <span class="u"> “Just how much control you have when we’re angry?” </span> </em> This time it was Kamukaru that asked the question, as he cut Hajime off. He has been silently absorbing the information and dissecting everything that was said. Mindful to not let a single thing be missed. But the two things that had stood out the most to him was control and influence.</p><p>
  <em><span class="u">"...From my estimate, more than eighty percent of your body. Well, Hajime’s body, and since you both have your own names, call me Hinata Yuuya.” </span>   </em>
</p><p> </p><p>~Hotel’s Restaurant.~</p><p> </p><p>Sitting at the large table, the remaining Islanders sat amongst themselves, patiently waiting for TeruTeru to put the last of the food out. When he was finally done, all of them dug in and started with light chatter before it moved on to more pressing matters. ”So, what are we going to do about them?” Akane asked in between mouthfuls of food. Earning her a somewhat exasperated look from Nekomaru, Fuyuhiko, Hiyoko, and Sonia for her lack of table manners. </p><p>Shaking her head, Hiyoko leaned forward and propped her face on her hands. With her elbows planted firmly on the table. ”What can we do? This is a matter between Hajime and Komaeda.”</p><p>Scoffing, Kazuichi looked away from her, causing Saionji to catch the look and suck her teeth indignantly. “Well, I don't see you coming up with any bright ideas?”</p><p>”Well, obviously, we can't leave Hajime alone with Komaeda. Although he tries to hide it, Komaeda is...quite fearful of Hajime.” The pinkette said, his arms crossed as he leaned back in his chair. “Besides, this isn’t something that can be solved just between those two. ”</p><p>“I would be surprised if he wasn’t fearful of Hajime after that ordeal, though,” Hiyoko commented offhandedly.</p><p>“Then we should ask Makoto if he can send a therapist,” Sonia suggested but was met with a quick dismissal from Mahiru.</p><p>“I highly doubt Komaeda-san would even consider therapy, let alone voice his problems to a complete and utter stranger.” She reasoned. </p><p>Frowning, the princess did see her point and knew that even getting Nagito to even consider the option was going to be like pulling teeth. They had a better chance of taking over the world again, then convincing Komaeda that a therapist wouldn't be so bad. She could already imagine all the countless headaches and arguments it would lead too if the other only knew what was suggested. “But what can we do then? A therapist for Hajime, perhaps?”</p><p>“Hajime is just as stubborn as Komaeda-san. He may...actually he will reject the idea as well.” The photographer counter. Feeling frustrated, Sonia released a heavy sigh. “Listen, I’m not trying to be negative or dismiss every well suggested thought that you have to give, but those two aren’t going to make this easy.”</p><p>Getting up from her spot at the table, Akane stretched her muscles and placed a hand on her hip, and tilted her head back, and ruffled her hair with the other hand in thought. “How about we don’t give them a choice. If we give them the option to choose to see somebody, they’ll just dismiss the entire idea and claim that they’re fine when in reality, they’re not.”</p><p>“That may result in them hating us. Just think about it.” Pekoyama pointed out. With her arms crossed, she leveled each and every one of her former classmates with a steely glare. “I know that Komaeda’s opinion on you guys doesn’t necessarily hold weight to any of you, but after seeing what Hinata has done to him. We can all honestly say that some parts of us have indeed grown to care about him despite his past actions genuinely. We have seen what he’s like when he’s calm when he’s sad and when he’s genuinely happy and at peace. Now let’s say if we do force them to go through with this. Will you guys be able to handle the possibility of Komaeda hating you? All of you? However, brief it, maybe? Better yet, despite his actions, will you be fine with Hajime’s wrath as well? We may be doing this for their own well being, but to them, this may seem like we’re practically forcing them to do something that’s not within their comfort zone. So I’ll ask this again, can you handle being hated by them, however briefly it maybe?”</p><p>It was silent for a moment, and then, Fuyuhiko groaned and ruffled his own hair as well. “Do we even got a fucking choice? If we leave them be, they won’t get better. If we even try to be their ‘therapist,’ which we definitely aren’t quality or even certified for this shit. We’ll be possibly setting them back. So I think I’ll be able to handle their misplaced hatred however brief it may be. Besides knowing Hajime, he’ll see reason within the first few seconds or minutes even. His brain works fast like that anyway. The same goes for Komaeda. He'll probably be able to deduce our objective within that very same day. He'll still be a stubborn piece of shit about it. Just to spite us. So whoever’s against Peko’s proposal speak now. If not, raise your hand if you're in agreement with the plan.”</p><p>Slowly one by one, the former Remnant agreed. Some slower than others since they weighed their options and thought over the idea carefully, as they knew that from here on out. That this may be their only chance to possibly help. And when it finally seemed like everyone was in agreement. Mahiru and Fuyuhiko shared a sigh, while Peko laid a conforming hand on her boyfriend’s shoulder.</p><p>“We can do this.” She said her voice light but still retaining its stern and firm tone. Reminding him once more that she was more than just his childhood friend and lover. She was his pillar, his rock, and without her, he’ll be forever lost, and right now, he couldn’t be more grateful to her as he was now as he offers her a small but genuine smile that was only reserved for her.</p><p> </p><p>“...yeah, you’re right.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hinata Yuuya...let me know how you guys feel about him. Okay? He's the complete manifestation of Hijame and Izuru’s anger at the world. At the countless experiments done to him and the killing game.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0021"><h2>21. The truth...</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>   Taking in a deep breath, Sonia clicked on the button on the laptop and waited patiently for the line to connect. She, along with everyone else, had picked a time for when it would be the most convenient to have this discussion with the agent, and they had all agreed that it had to be on the very next monthly check-up report. But instead of a simple statement, they will bring up everything. </p><p>Even the pregnancy.</p><p>Looking around the room, her former classmates surrounded her. Waiting for the familiar face of a brown-haired, green-eyed man to connect on his end, and when he did, she held her breath. Turning to where Fuyuhiko, Mikan, and Peko were. She saw them off to the side. Their expression grim and knew that now wasn't the time to get cold feet. When it finally hit her that she would be the one to reveal everything.</p><p>She took one last deep breath and looked straight into the camera, into Makoto’s eyes and started on her piece. Aware that the happy smile that she saw on the agent's face was about to be wiped away clean from what she's about to confess.</p><p> </p><p>~Hours later.~</p><p> </p><p>There were many things that Makoto had mentally prepared himself for, whenever the islanders called him. But what he hadn't been prepared for was this. To hear that Hajime, the official leader of the Remnant had committed rape wasn’t something that he thought he’ll ever hear or wrap his mind around. </p><p>Not now, not never. </p><p>He didn't wish to believe it. He refused to believe it. But knew that he couldn't possibly retain that naive mindset because anything and everything was possible. Especially after everything he’s been through. After everything, the Remnant has been through. So with a very reluctant sigh, he pinched the bridge of his nose in thought and frustration and bowed his head down low. Mind racing, not once even slowing down for a second to process one thought before another took over, again and again. It was a constant cycle, and his head began to pound, an indication of an oncoming headache beginning to form. But for the life of him, he couldn’t stop the thoughts that flowed around in his head. He felt dizzy and close to losing his mind, and before that could happen, a familiar deep voice snapped him out of his thoughts. For which he couldn’t be any more grateful for, because, at this rate, he felt as if he was close to losing his mind along with the painstaking pound of a migraine truly forming. <em>'Fuck. It wasn’t a headache.’ </em></p><p>“Makoto?”</p><p>Looking up, he saw Byakuya and Kirigiri standing before him. Both of them with their arms crossed firmly and with a frown adorning the former Heir’s mouth, while Kyoko allowed the slightest furrow of her brows in concern. “Are you alright, Makoto?” Kirigiri asked, her tone soft and gentle. Throughout course, of their friendship, she, along with Byakuya, had gradually softened up thanks to Makoto’s guidance, friendship, and patients.</p><p>Trying to smile despite the awful news that he just heard, Naegi tried his hardest not to worry his friends. But it seems that despite his efforts, they weren't convinced if the deepening of Byakuya’s frown and the light downward tug of Kirigiri’s own lips as well weren’t anything to go by. Sighing, he knew he had no choice but to tell them. They were the only ones he could truly trust with this information, since he couldn’t find it within himself to confide with Asahina, Hiro, &amp; Toko. They lacked tact and were far too quick to judge and become indecisive which proved to be quite the problem. </p><p>They were for the better word unreliable. A very unreliable bunch that he didn't have the time or the patient to deal with at this moment. He needed someone, preferably either Kirigiri or Byakuya, to talk to. However, since they were here. He thought that the timing was perfect. Too perfect, in fact. It was honestly too convenient for him, and he didn’t waste time in pleasantries and told them to sit down with them before checking if they were indeed the only ones around and that the room was sealed tight. Once he was sure that no one would hear their conversation, did he begin to talk. Not sugar coating or glossing over the situation, since there'll be no point in seeking their guidance if he were to soften the blow and not tell the whole truth. He desperately needed their help for this to work.</p><p>Placing a hand underneath her chin, Kirigiri sighed and closed her eyes once she and Byakuya heard everything. Once she gathered her thoughts as much as she can, she glanced over to the former heir and saw that he had a rather stoic expression. Knowing that the news wasn’t pleasant, she dismissed the strange look for the time being and focused on Makoto. “We’ll have to tread carefully. This isn't something that can be fixed by a simple apology. And it can't be brushed under the rug either. Komaeda-san will need support, being a rape victim is a serious and traumatizing matter. He's a survivor. Then there's the matter of the baby...As for Hajime, well there’s the concerned matter of an entire personality that was once dormant may not be anymore.”</p><p>Nodding Naegi saw where she was coming from. “I want to say we should get them to a psychologist. But…”</p><p>“You know good and well that the difficulty isn’t with finding them a psychologist but for them to actually go to them and do this willingly, isn’t that right?” This time it was Byakuya that answered, and for once, Makoto couldn’t be more grateful that his friends knew him well enough to pick up on his concerns and properly voice what he can’t put into words.</p><p>“Yeah…” He looked down and missed the look that was shared between the detective and former heir of the Togami’s conglomerate. </p><p>“Maybe…it’s best if we leave the decision up the islanders,” Kirigiri suggested, it was evident that despite everything that she has ever done that this was out of her comfort zone. She could handle murders cases with ease, but when it came to live people, she wasn’t too sure how to go about the situation. She automatically ruled out the option of the police. Knowing that there was no way for them to file a report without that leading to the public knowledge about the Renmant’s whereabouts. They couldn’t afford to risk that. Not after everything they went through to get them to where they’re at now. There was simply too much at risk. </p><p>The next possible option was for them to see a therapist or psychologist. Someone that was discreet and can promise to keep the confidential information of the Remnant a secret. It shouldn't be too hard with Togami’s help. But then, there was also the issue of the potential patients themselves. “We need to find them a therapist if they decide to go through with it. They wouldn’t consult Komaeda or Hinata. Not with this. Their answer would be an obvious no.”</p><p>They needed time.</p><p>But she felt that even if she said that, she knew. That there wasn't going to be an extension. Not with this case. “This will obviously take time,” Togami said, causing her to shift her attention towards him. Grateful for his bluntness. “If we’re going to help, we’ll need to do background checks and start now. Naegi...ask them if they want us to send somebody. This should take us no more than two weeks.”</p><p>Nodding, the brunette got up and before he can go and make the call in his office. He turned to them with a grateful smile. Tired and worn but happy with the help of his friends. “Thanks, guys.”</p><p>Pushing his glasses up, Byakuya allowed a small and delicate smile to grace his lips ever so slightly. “Don’t mention it.”</p><p>Pulling out her phone and typing a few things in, Kirigiri also smiled. Hers was more than just a bit fainter than Togami’s own smile. “As he said, don’t mention it. We’re happy to help.”</p><p>“Right.” And with that, he left to go to his office.</p>
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<a name="section0022"><h2>22. I'll do anything I can.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>   Mikan can do nothing more than stare at Nagito’s still form from her place by the door. After the meeting with the remaining remnants, she had been informed by none other than Sonia, herself, of their final decision on the matter. Yet it hasn't been revealed that Komaeda is pregnant with their leader’s child. </p><p>It was a colossal mess just waiting to erupt, and she knew that they would have to reveal it sooner rather than later, or else they’ll start to ask questions once Komaeda starts to show signs of his pregnancy. After all, it was a well-known fact that Komaeda doesn’t eat as much as he should, and it would draw suspicion if he gains weight. And from a medical standpoint, it would be the best option to have everyone know of the situation. That way, they can avoid stressing out Komaeda in the long run. </p><p>Then there was another issue that frightened her greatly. </p><p>His weight.</p><p>With his thin and wiry frame, he was fragile, which worried her immensely. She knew that she’d have to put him on a soon healthy diet and fast, or else his body would become too weak even to handle the pregnancy. That and the risk of losing the baby without the proper nutrients would heighten if he didn’t get it soon. It was a worrisome situation. There was so much she had to take into account. <br/> <br/>There wasn’t much time for her to truly process before she had to quickly take charge and do as much damage control as she can. After that, there were more and more issues piling up after that issue of his weight. There was the problem with his illness.</p><p>The illness that plagued Komaeda had done nothing more than weaken his body. Then there was also the abuse that his body had sustained when he was with Hajime. The pregnancy wasn’t helping things either. It was straining his body. It was becoming far too much for his body to handle.</p><p>The stress.</p><p>The pressure.</p><p>She knew it was only a matter of time before his body collapsed upon itself, but if there was one thing she was particular about. It was her ability. </p><p>Her ability to help. Her expertise as a nurse.</p><p>Her skills as not just any nurse but the Ultimate Nurse which was recognized by Hope's Peak Academy itself. She knew she was good. Extraordinarily good and capable nurse with her extensive knowledge. She refused to accept the fact that there wasn’t any possible way to help him. She was going to help whether he liked it or not. She wasn’t going to allow Nagito to suffer. She will help in whatever way she can. </p><p>She wasn’t going to allow him to die. She could not permit it.</p><p>He needed her, even if he smiled at her and said otherwise. Cause she knew, he was only lying as not to make her worry. Not to feel dependent on her or anyone for that matter. It wasn’t pride that made him that way, but his obsession with being useful to Ultimates. The mantra that he had in the Neo World was an over the top exaggeration of his personality in real life. Despite it being over the top, it still had some truth to what he thought about himself and others and now that they were in the real world. It still resided within him, but at a different level. It was a tamer version compared to Neo World’s Komaeda, and it was a relief that he wasn't exactly like that. </p><p>“What are you doing here, Mikan?” Startled out of her thoughts, the nurse jumped slightly in surprise and then allowed a ghost of a smile to appear on her lips. </p><p>“Just checking up on you.” She said.</p><p>“Oh, I see.” Taking a quick glance at her, Komaeda went back to staring out the window. “Then do what you must.”</p><p>Moving from her place by the door, she stepped into the room and proceeded to Komaeda’s bedside.</p><p>Checking up on the machines that were hooked up to him. She was satisfied with the results she saw, as she saw no difference or immediate signs of something being off. Everything was running smoothly, and she couldn’t be happier and relieved. “I’ll need to give you a proper meal plan. You’re underweight. You’re sixty kg. That’s beyond underweight...it’s not healthy. Especially since you’re having a baby. The baby will be at risk. Your life, body, and baby are in danger if you don’t eat properly, Nagito. There’s no negotiating around that. You will eat. If not for you. Then for your child. After all, you’re eating for two now.” Nagito knew what she said was right. Besides, there was no point in arguing when Mikan went into Ultimate Nurse mode. She became surprisingly resistant and pushy when it involved one’s health.</p><p>Not giving any indication that he heard her, Komaeda continued to stare out blankly, causing the girl to sigh. Checking once more that the equipment was fine, she straightened up. Before she could turn around and leave, she said. “I'll bring your breakfast in a few minutes. You are to eat three meals a day with two snacks in between breakfast and lunch or lunch and dinner. It all depends on you. However, I won’t allow you to skip it, okay?” Again Nagito said nothing. Making the girl stare sadly at his frozen stiff body. </p><p>Turning around to leave, she walked to the door but was stopped once she heard Nagito’s soft-spoken voice for what felt like ages. “Thank you...Mikan...and I understand, I’ll be looking forward to those meals.”</p><p>Smiling tiredly, Mikan glanced back and saw that Komaeda was already staring back at her. A ghost of a smile playing at his lips too. It was faint, but it was still there, and it counted for something. This made her feel relieved that he wasn’t closing off his emotions now and was willing to try to cooperate with her and acknowledge her efforts and what must be done for him and the child. </p><p>With an extra bounce in her step, she set off to get Nagito’s breakfast assembled.</p><p> </p><p>~Sometime later.~</p><p> </p><p>He couldn’t stand not knowing if Komaeda was alright or not. Hajime paced his room, back rammed straight and shoulders tense. He was anxious, and before he could stop himself, he was out of his cottage and heading towards the hospital. As he went, he came across Fuyuhiko, Pekoyama, and Sonia and was stopped by the them. “Where are you going?” Fuyuhiko asked. Hands stuffed in his pocket, body taut. </p><p>Sonia stood beside him, hands clasped in front of her body. While Peko simply observed. Sighing, Hajime decided on the truth. “Honestly, I wanted to check up on Na-Komaeda-san. I'm not going to come close to him. I just want-”</p><p>“I understand, but we cannot allow you to go there alone. We’ll be supervising you. We can't afford for Komaeda to have a negative reaction upon seeing you. Not in his state. You'll put him at risk.” Peko stated. As she said this, Fuyuhiko and Sonia shared a look, before the ex-princess declared her departure.</p><p>”At risk? At-risk from what?” Hajime asked. His question was met with blank, unseeing eyes. Before finally, the ex-Yakuza members turned around to begin their journey to the hospital. Not caring if Hajime followed or not. </p><p>Pekoyama was the one that answered him, though, but she also never once gave him a complete answer to his question. “It is best if you found out later. Not through us, though. But for now, just see how Nagito is doing. Okay?”</p><p>Uncertainty and dread began to fill him instantly, and before he could stop himself, he answered shortly. “...Okay.”</p><p> </p>
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<a name="section0023"><h2>23. Unwavering.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>    Hajime stood with his arms crossed, his brows creasing together as he stares intensely through the large window of the hospital room. They were on the second floor, observing the scene before them as Mikan flitted around Nagito, while he was lying still on the large bed. Watching as she moved around to get what she needed from each cabinet within the medical room. Her movements were precise and confident as she measured the medicines that would be administrated into the saline bag. Looking over his shoulder, he glances back at Fuyuhiko and Pekoyama, standing behind him with grim expressions. “So, mind telling me what have you've guys been hiding from me? I'm not exactly dumb, you know.”</p><p>Not taking his eyes off of Mikan, Fuyuhiko pursed his lips and stuffed his hands further into his pockets. “You know...I can ask you the same thing, man. Are you, you?”</p><p>Looking off to the side, successfully averting his gaze off of the two. Hajime stared silently at the wall. Appearing in deep thought before finally answering. “I suppose you can say that. I'm me right now. I guess you figured it out, huh?”</p><p>Causing Fuyuhiko to scoff. “Damn right, I did. However, it wasn't hard...once I stopped seeing you through a different lens. Instead of the version that could do no wrong. It wasn’t hard to spot the signs that you were different. You were always more forceful with Nagito when you weren’t yourself, along with hogging his attention. You even kept him hidden in your cottage now that I think about it.” Taking a deep and even out-breath, the ex-heir rolled his shoulders and straightened up slightly. “Even so...is it safe to assume that you did develop another personality? A violent one this time.”</p><p>“He is the me that wants to bring about destruction and pain to the world. To see it burn. I, along with Kamukara Izuru, hold a deep resent to the world. So deep that we unknowingly manifested another version of me. That meeting with Togami Byakuya was the final nail in the coffin. It finalized my hate.” Hajime says, his eyes no longer trained on the wall but back on Nagito’s still body. The boy was still frighteningly small and frail, with his skinny frame and pale complexion. </p><p>Sighing Peko, allowed her limbs to become less stiff and loosen up her posture and leaned against the wall behind them. “And will this new personality be a problem in the future? How will you move forward? Can you contain or control him? We can't allow you to be near Nagito again if he's in danger whenever you're around him. Unlike us, he doesn't have the strength or the stamina to go against you. When we were the Ultimate Despair, all of us except for him engaged in battle on numerous occasions. So we know how to fight and hold our own. He doesn't.”</p><p>”She is right, ya know.” A single eye stared hard at Hajime’s back. Feeling Fuyuhiko’s eye glaring into his back. Hajime sigh. “Even Hiyoko and Mioda can fight you. They won’t win, but they’ll definitely manage to last more than a few measly hours. Nagito cannot. He won’t last a second unless his luck is on his side. He’ll die otherwise.”</p><p>“I know.” Hinata agreed. Well aware that being around Nagito wasn’t an option if he can’t control his anger. It would only trigger the switch, and he’ll be back to hurting anybody in his path. He couldn’t afford that. Not with Nagito. “Which is why I’ll be working with Makoto. If I can get him to provide his assistance, I plan to have this third personality to become dormant.”</p><p>A brief flicking of bewilderment passes through the ex-yakuza members' faces before they shook their heads and turn their attention back on Komaeda, who still hasn’t realized their presence.</p><p>“If it’s possible… just be careful. Not for our sake but for Komaeda and yourself too.” Peko says softly. Her tone is gentle and soft, unlike her previous stern and harsh tone.</p><p>Not sparing her or Fuyuhiko another glance. Hajime could only sigh once again, as he locked eyes with Nagito for the first time in weeks and saw gentle grey-green eyes widen in shock before returning to normal and offering nothing more than a forced smile. “I know, and I will.”</p><p>Clicking his tongue, Fuyuhiko tilted his head and shared a look with Peko, before returning his stare back at Hajime. “Tch, go to him. I know what we said earlier, but you guys need to talk. If not now. You’ll never will. Not with everyone else trying to make sure you guys keep your distance from each other. Plus, you never know. You might find out what we’ve been hiding from you this whole time. Besides, this might give you both closure. Well, Nagito, for his case. Just go, you have three hours. Don’t make ya regret this.”</p><p>Glancing back in shock, Hajime looked to Fuyuhiko then Pekoyama and then back to Fuyuhiko before smiling. “Alright, then.” Turning back to the room, Hajime stepped forward before stopping. However, instead of turning back as the two expected he would. His next words caused them to smile. “Thanks, guys.”</p><p>With hesitant, Hajime resumed his way to the room and gently knocked on the door before he received entry. His heart pounding in his chest as he opened the door and saw Nagito, looking unsure but unsurprised to see him be the one to enter. While Mikan could only glare at him. “Hello, Hinata-san.” And despite everything, Hajime could only mentally and physically relax as he heard that pleasant sweet voice again. The voice that made everything better and worth every hardship he faced.</p><p>Nagito Komaeda’s sweet lovely voice was the only thing that can genuinely soothe him. Yet, it was that same voice that plagued his mind with nightmares as he remembers that night that started it all and the following nights after it. And for the life of him, Hajime wishes that that same voice could have worked on the other him just as well. That way, none of this would have never have happened.</p><p>Expect reality doesn’t work that way, so forcing his feelings down. He offers the boy the brightest smile he could muster. “Hey.”</p><p>The two stared unsure where to go from there. However, the staring didn't last long as Mikan shifted her body in between the two. Successfully blocking Nagito from Hajime’s line of sight. “I’m going to have to ask you to leave.”</p><p>Stunned, the other could do nothing more than take a hesitant step back. Surprise that Mikan of all people would be the one to throw him out. “Please, I just want to talk to him. Then, I’ll leave.”</p><p>“N-not happening. Now leave.” The nurse said firmly, though at first, her words had come out in a slight stutter. Despite that fact, she was able to sound stable and resolute with her decision and words at the very end. She spread her arms out to justify that Hinata wasn't going to get through to get to Nagito. She wasn't going to allow it. Just as she went to repeat what she said earlier as she can already see him forming an argument at the tip of his tongue. She felt a slight tug on her uniform and turned back to look at Nagito with a bit of confusion. With his head bowed low, she couldn't see his eyes as his hair blocked them, but she knew without a doubt that he was conflicted if she was reading his body language correctly. </p><p>“... I don’t mind hearing him out.” The white-haired boy had finally said and seemed to shrink within himself a second later as she gasped. Feeling her eyes soften, Mikan slowly turned around to face Komaeda fully and kneeled a bit in front of him to look at him directly in the face. And slowly reached for his hand, giving him not only the chance that she meant no harm but also so that if he wanted to pull away or even stop her attempt, he could. Before finally grasping his hands in her and for the first time, she had to wonder if the boy’s hand always felt so soft and delicate before finally shifting her attention to the situation at hand. </p><p>“Are you sure?” She asked, her tone gentle and soft. Since this is a delicate situation. Because even though Komaeda was a smart and cunning individual, it was easy to see that this needed to be handled with care. After all, this was the second time she’s seen Nagito even show a sign of weakness. Not since the Liar Despair disease. So she refused to show her usually weak and timid side of her, in front of Nagito, not when he needed her the most right now. Right now, she wasn’t just Mikan Tsu but the Ultimate Nurse. She needed to be strong.</p><p>Giving her a nod as to assure her that everything would be alright and he could handle it. Mikan reluctantly stepped back and allowed Hajime, who kept silent until now, to be face to face with Nagito again. Heaving a sigh, Komaeda smiled, but it was more along the line of a grimace the longer Mikan and Hajime stared at it. “I...I have something to tell you, Hinata-san.”</p><p>“And I you.” It was silent as the two stared into each other's eyes. Gauging each other's expression, one unsure of how to break the news, and the other scared of what more he could possibly lose if he told what’s hidden inside.</p><p>His truth.</p><p>However, nothing can prepare them for the emotional rollercoaster they were about to experience once secrets were revealed.</p><p> </p>
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<a name="section0024"><h2>24. Pregnant?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>    Delicately placing his hand over his stomach, which wasn't an action that was missed by Hajime’s sharp eyes. Nagito held his stare for a long time before finally allowing a tired sigh to pass his soft lips. He was tethering on the edge, not quite knowing how to start or where to go from here. But he was determined to try. But he was tired, exhausted even. So with his shoulders sagging, he was stunned into a brief silence as Hajime spoke up first. His voice was soft and gentle like a newborn's touch; he was trying to seem as non-threatening as possible as not to startle him. “May I come closer? I’ll stay here if you don’t feel comfortable.”</p><p>Komaeda found himself staring into Hajime’s eyes, searching. For what he didn’t know, but after a while, he gave a hesitant nod. Watching with curiosity mixed with a bit of apprehension as Hinata drew closer to him and without warning, Hajime had kneeled on one knee. Looking at him in question, he was blinded by the nervous yet so painfully genuine smile directed at him and smiled a bit himself. As a result, his posture became less tense, even going as far as relaxing more than he thought he should. As he finally figured that Hajime meant him no harm. However, he was stunned yet again as Hajime asked another question this time; he took a bit longer to respond. “May I touch you? Only your hands.”</p><p>Uncertainty clouded Nagito’s mind. He desperately tried to push away those traitorous thoughts as he knew that if Hajime really wanted to hurt him, there wouldn’t be anything stopping him. Maybe Akane, Nekomaru, and Pekoyama could hold him off long enough for him to hide, but in the end. Even he knew they weren’t a match for the other. They would be severely outclassed for a multitude of reasons.</p><p>So with a bit of reluctance, he nodded once again. Sighing softly, as Hinata gently took his hands into his. His mind temporarily went blank for a second as images flashed through his head of those same hands handling his body with such roughness. It was an unsettling contrast that made him antsy. He was aware that those same hands could deal such punishing blows and could snap him in half with bare minimum effort yet was holding his hand so gently that he barely felt the touch. “Do you wish for me to move away? I can let go.”</p><p>It was the deep monotone voice that made him snapback. He was surprised that Izuru had shown himself and was currently looking at him with the slightest hint of concern in his otherwise emotionless and dull eyes. “When did you…”</p><p>“A few seconds ago.” His answer was curt and straight to the point. </p><p>“...I see.” Squeezing Hajime’s hands. Komaeda found himself staring at their linked hands and closed his eyes. “Shall I be the one to start?” Komaeda asked. </p><p>“It is up to you. I will neither force you to go first or go second or at all if you wish.” Izuru said, his voice despite not changing by much held just the slightest touch of worry. It was undetected to an untrained ear, but Mikan and Nagito heard it all the same. It was evident that Kamakura cared, or else he wouldn’t have taken over and calmed Nagito down the second he sensed the sudden and internal change within Nagito, as detaches himself from reality and almost got lost within his memories. Suddenly without warning, Izuru began to rub small and calculate gentle circles into the back of Komaeda’s hands. It felt nice, so nice that Komaeda smiled softly before trying to speak.</p><p>“...I...I-” Feeling tears of frustration well up in his eyes, Nagito scoff, he was annoyed that his emotions were all over the place. He wasn’t necessarily the emotional person out there, but due to hormones, he had become far more open and emotional than he would personally like.      </p><p>Gently squeezing the hands that were holding his own yet again. Komaeda opened his eyes, looked back up, and stared into Izuru’s dull eyes before finally saying what has plagued his mind since his discovery, along with Mikan’s confirmation. </p><p>“...I’m pregnant.” </p><p>This was it, he finally said it and without a slight stutter either. So he knows that Kamukura heard him loud and clear and that there wasn't any possible way that he could've misheard him. And he was correct once Ultimate stopped his administration. It was like he was frozen in place, which wasn't unusual as Kamukura could become very still and almost seem like he wasn't there. Now, though it unnerved him, he needed Hajime. He needed Izuru. He needed them to say something, anything honestly. </p><p>Allowing his tears to fall, which seemed to snap Izuru back into attention as he brought a hand up and gently grabbed his chin. Nagito said nothing as his forehead touched Izuru’s. “I see. Then we shall prepare preparations. You don’t have to go through this alone. Not while Hajime and I are here.” </p><p>It was all Komaeda needed to hear before he threw his arms around Izuru’s shoulders, his body trembling as he cried. Hesitant arms went around the other’s frail, trembling body and before Nagito knew what was happening or could even explain the changes. He knew that Hajime took over as confident fingers ran their ways through his long white hair. And suddenly, he felt at peace again despite everything he’s been through.</p><p>Despite everything, they've been through as a couple.</p><p>He just knew everything from now would be fine for them. It will take a while for them to get back to how they used to be at first during the early stage of their relationship. But over time, it will be worth it.</p><p>He just knew. However, he knew that his pregnancy was just the tip of the iceberg. He was prepared; after all, he had a feeling what Hajime was going to say.</p><p>A feeling that it involved his third personality.</p>
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<a name="section0025"><h2>25. My Truth.</h2></a>
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    <p>   After finally regaining some semblance of composure, Nagito pulled back from Hajime’s embrace and delicately wiped away his tears and stared at him with red puffy eyes. “Now, what is it you wanted to tell me, Hinata-san.”</p><p>The sudden shift of attention made Hajime flinch, and his eyes widened momentarily as he had almost forgotten what he intended to say. After all, Nagito had just dropped the fact that he will be a father. It was quite a distraction as it was unexpected and grating.</p><p>Biting his lips, he quickly and efficiently gathered his thoughts and took a deep breath to steel his nerves. Then clenched his hands into fist tentatively and breathed out steadily to regulate his breathing. Knowing that now it was his turn to reveal his secret, he felt the slightest bit of panic for a split second but calmed himself down before he could really process the feeling. As he knew that he was cowardly and unfair in taking forever to say his piece after Nagito had revealed his secret. And judging by his earlier behavior, he had been nervous, scared even. Scare of him and his reaction, yet he had taken the initiative and power through despite that fear.</p><p>And yet, despite all the talents he possessed, Hajime had never felt more pathetic than he did now. At this moment, when he honestly thought about it.</p><p>With that in mind, he squared his shoulders and spoke up. “There’s no easy way of saying this. So I’ll be direct… I have another personality residing inside me. He’s the one that hurt… you…” Hinata finished off uncertainty. He was prepared for the worst. To be slapped, yelled at, or even cursed. But none of that happened as Nagito only offered up a small smile, eyes glinting knowingly. Only for him to pause and slowly grab Komaeda’s thin shoulders before gently shaking them as he realized why Nagito was oddly calm and had that knowing glint in the first place. </p><p>”...Y-you knew...” He finally said, his voice dwindling into a mere whisper as the revelation of it all came to light. He felt as if he was doused in cold water. But oddly enough, he relieved that Nagito knew. However, that feeling was fleeting as another emotion that entered him made him pause. It was then that he realized that Nagito was talking once again and had to refocus his attention on him.</p><p>“I’ve known for a while… That it wasn’t truly you.” Nagito said. Taking in words, Hajime felt his world come to a stop. Even if it wasn’t him that did those actions. It was still another version of him, so it might as well be him. </p><p>He felt wrong that this was seemingly being dismissed. He was at fault whether he liked it or not. Yet he knew that Nagito would never blame him. And as he came to that final conclusion, things started to piece together until it finally made sense. His thoughts and assessment were never wrong because of his talents, and once everything became clear to him within seconds. He could only feel an undeniable pain squeeze at his chest as his breathing became ragged. He wanted to deny the truth of it all desperately but knew that was the cowardly way out, which is why he found himself asking. Begging to know the truth. “H-how could you not look at me with hate?” Why can’t you hate, when I’ve done nothing to stop my other self from hurting you went unsaid, but it was deeply and heavily implied. </p><p>He couldn’t stop himself from shaking; he deserved to be hated.</p><p>If only he had seen the signs that his inexplicable rage was far from healthy, he would have gotten the help he needed sooner. Maybe they wouldn't be in this predicament that they are in now. Though logically speaking, Hinata knew there was only so much that could and couldn't have been prevented. </p><p>However, before his mind could go more in-depth, he felt an undeniable soft hand cup his cheek and soon felt Komaeda’s forehead press lightly against his own and instantly calmed down once he remembered who he was with. “You’re a smart guy. You should know the answer to that question easily?” Nagito said sadly, his eyes were closed, and his lashes rested beautifully against smooth pale cheeks. </p><p>Gulping Hajime went to deny the claim that he knew but held his tongue once Nagito briefly kissed him. As if knowing what Hajime was going to say. “I love you. But I also wish I could hate you. You didn’t protect me from the one person who could truly hurt me after all.”</p><p>Taking another sharp intake of breath, Hinata trembled and clenched his eyes and fist tightly. “You didn’t protect me from yourself.”</p><p>And even with his eyes closed tight, tears somehow manage to make their way down Hajime’s cheeks and without warning the soft touches that he felt withdrawn from his face. Causing him to snap his opened eyes to see that Nagito had gotten up and was staring at him with longing. But oddly enough, there was a resignation within that look that shook him to the core. “I love you, though I can’t find it within myself to forgive you. At least not now. But I don’t hate you. I’m…”</p><p>Forcing himself to nod, Hinata stood up as well and gently caressed Komaeda’s face. Allowing the act, Nagito smiled sadly. “I’ll become someone you can trust again. Someone that won’t hurt you, because that version of me wasn’t acceptable. It had no right to do that to you. It may not have been ‘me,’ but it was still me, and regardless of that fact, I hurt you. I can never forgive myself for that either.”</p><p>Leaning into the Hajime’s touch before pulling away completely. Komaeda decided to put some distance between them and had a pained expression for a moment before smoothing out his expression entirely. “I look forward to the day that your perseverance and hope shine through, and you become that man again,” Komaeda says softly. </p><p>Unable to handle Nagito’s stare any longer, Hajime looked away. “I do too.”</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I might redo this entire again. So please enjoy and tell me what you think. Also, how many chapters do you guys want this to be? Cause I think I might make it around forty or forty-ish chapters.</p>
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<a name="section0026"><h2>26. Why can't she?</h2></a>
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    <p>    Gently grabbing Nagito’s arm before the other could leave, Hajime sighed. There was one thing he was dreading to ask but knew that he had too. “Wait, before you go. Can I...ask something?” Giving a small nod of his head, Nagito stood silently. Waiting somewhat patiently as Hajime gathers his thoughts. Nagito began to mentally prepare himself to expect anything and everything that could be asked. But even he felt himself falters at the question that Hajime asked next despite psyching himself up for any inquiry. “Just… if it’s not too personal. Can you tell me how you were able to get pregnant?” And of course, it had to be a question that Nagito wasn’t entirely mentally prepared to answer. It was a hard-hitting and baffling question to even answer. </p><p>And for the first time, Nagito was at an actual loss. He had half a mind to leave and not even bother with a reply. But before he could even take such action, he shakily took a deep inhale of breath and knew that this sort of question would have been inevitable somewhere deep down. He was sure that Hajime was curious about how he, a biology man, could have gotten pregnant in the first place. It was no doubt at the forefront of his mind anyway, so swallowing his nerves. He prepared himself to answer. </p><p>Nagito released a barely audible sigh, and smiled wryly and said, one name that made Hajime's blood run cold. He knew deep down, that be him saying it. Hajime would become ridden with understanding and dread. “Junko Enoshima.” The sudden realization of what she could have possibly done immediately crossed Hajime’s mind, and he dropped Nagito’s wrist as if he's been burnt severely. And stumble back, putting a respectable amount of distance between them. With his heart pounding loudly and blood rushing to his ears, Hajime looked at him as if he was seeing him for the first time.</p><p>“She...s-she… that bitch, how dare she!” Hajime struggled to get his words out; he was at a loss. However, his sudden word choice did, in fact, surprise Nagito, as he looked at him with curiosity. “How are you so calm about any of this?” He asked. "She messed around with your body. Why? Why did she have to do this? Wasn't it enough that she... that she brainwashed you, hurt you. Why couldn’t she leave you alone!? Just Why?"</p><p>Understanding Hinata's frustration, Nagito gave a sad smile that made him feel as though he was the one that was being comforted. Made him feel awful, and he wasn't even the one that needed the support right now. Yet, here he was, being completely and utterly emotional, even though it wasn't even his body that was tampered with. Nagito was the only one who deserved to be emotional here, but he couldn't help it. Tears were threatening to fall the longer he was face to see that smile. Nagito's smile. "It was probably her last fuck you to me. She probably thought it would be despairing if I ended up pregnant. Besides, I was her favorite. But it’s okay, Hajime." </p><p>As if hearing his name was all Hajime needed before he went completely still and looked at him with so much confliction but kept quiet. However, he did absolutely nothing as his tears fell, but he vaguely noted that there weren’t any horrific next to his name and that his first name had been called. "It's okay because we're having a baby despite this mess. An innocent child despite Junko's interference even beyond the dead. We'll be parents in a couple of months. We should look at this as a gift. Turn this into something positive. Like hope, our hope. So please don't be angry, we'll figure this out. The only thing we could do is be good co-parents." </p><p>Knowing that it was beyond pointless to argue at this point and be angry. Hajime smiled, his smile full of acceptance and resignation as he realized that maybe this could be a good thing. "You're right. We'll definitely figure this out one way or another. I'll make sure of it." However, just as fast as that enthusiasm response had come, Hajime could only grimace as a thought that was so fleeting drifted into his mind, it left him feeling sour despite its quick departure. Shaking his head as if to clear the thought away, he smiled, but the damage had already been done as he became less hopeful and said. "You know, I should be happy that I'm going to be a dad. But are you truly okay with this, with me being the child's father? I'm...me..."</p><p>Now it was Nagito’s turn to grab his hands. Closing the distance between them once again, Nagito stepped closer to him and leaned comfortably into Hajime's body. "And you're still the man I love. I wouldn't want anyone else to be the father. You may have your faults, but you acknowledge them. You're trying for me. If you weren't, you wouldn't have apologized to me in your own way. You would have also kept your other personality a secret from me. And you wouldn’t have come or even ask for my permission even to touch me if you weren’t trying your best. You’re considering my feelings. So no, I don't mind that you're the father, after all, if I recall correctly. I did say I'm in love with the hope that rests within you. What I meant to say at that time was that I love you."</p><p>And it was all Hajime needed to hear before he carefully wrapped Nagito in a tight embrace. His tears renewed, and he sobbed softly into Nagito's neck. Rubbing delicate, soothing circles on Hinata's back, Komaeda could only say, "There, there it's okay, Hajime. It’s okay.”</p>
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<a name="section0027"><h2>27. Announcement time!!</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Okay, so this idea just came to me, and I want all of my readers' opinions about this. Whether it's good or bad, I thought about doing another story. The story would be an alternate universe where the Remnants of Despair were never caught. Kamukura Izuru would be the official leader of the Remnants once Junko was confirmed dead. So he wouldn't just be an associate that stands by if he was the official leader. I'm also toying with the idea of Nagito never finding out about Junko, which would, in turn, prevent a lot of things from happening. He wouldn't have been drowned in despair. There's also the fact that I would be extending his suspension, which would've have lasted longer too. So in other words, Nagito never got affected by the Despair Disease or found that secret passageway, but was capture by his classmates and turned into Kamukura Izuru's slave later on. Chiaki would still have the same outcome. Which is her dying.</p><p> So here's a sneak peek of what I've been thinking.</p><p>P.s. After sitting with my laptop for hours, I have the first few chapters written and will be rewriting them and posting them. So yes the story is a go.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>   Despite having a collar around his neck connected by a long chain, that rattle at the slightest movement, along with a pair of heavy ankle bracelets and equally heavy cuffs on his wrist. Nagito was incredibly light on his feet as he walked the halls before finding himself standing in front of his master’s office. A trembling hand raised to knock on the door, and Komaeda waited patiently for permission for entry. It wasn’t long till he heard the soft command of his master’s voice coming through the door that he acted.</p><p>With a huff, Nagito pushed the door open, it was heavy, but once it was opened, he cautiously stepped inside Kamukaru’s office and spied the man sitting down at his desk. The laptop in front of the Ultimate Hope shined brightly and made Nagito briefly worry about the other’s eyesight before he sighed and went over to him. As he suddenly remembers why he was here in the first place. His task. “Kamakura-sama, the others are here as you requested. Shall I inform them that you will be done soon?”</p><p>Not even sparing Nagito a glance, Izuru’s hands flew across the keyboard and typed in serials upon serials of codes that Nagito had no idea what they were used for. However, his attention went back to Kamukura as he heard him speak. “I'll be downstairs by dinner time. Inform them that if they were to leave. There will be repercussions for defying me, am I understood?”</p><p>Giving a hesitant nod of his head Komaeda clasped his hands in front of him and bowed. But swiftly stood back up as an uncertain and off-putting thought came to mind. And before he could even stop himself from speaking, it was already too late as his mouth moved faster than his brain could even process. “I don’t think they’ll be happy about that, Master. I...also don’t think I should be the one to relay that message. They'll kill me.”</p><p>Abruptly stopping what he was doing, Kamukaru glanced up at Komaeda. His stare impassive, and he was quick to note that the other began to fidget the longer he stared at him. He knew that his otherwise emotionless gaze intimidated the other as his expression was utterly voided of any emotion. It unnerved most people who’ve actually had the opportunity to encounter him and made human interaction tedious at best.</p><p>However, right now, he found this particular interaction, just the slightest bit amusing. So without warning, his hand shot up and grabbed the chain around Nagito’s neck, roughly causing the other to choke and stumble only to land harshly on his knees. Bringing the chain closer to him, which forced Nagito to come close as well, Kamukaru tilted his head. “I don’t recall asking for your opinion. But if you feel that way, I suppose I’ll go now, however, for speaking out of turn. There will be punishment. Understood?”</p><p> </p><p> </p><hr/><p>This story is now officially been greenlit! I repeat this story is now officially been greenlit. Check out the story today!! The next chapter will be posted tomorrow.</p><p>Link is here ---&gt;https://archiveofourown.org/works/25833466</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I REPEAT THE STORY IS A GO!!</p>
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